Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion!
At present time, some people in Indonesia think that a change is always a good idea to do. I strongly agree to this notion. This leads to something new which surely benefits us. However, some other people argue to spend their lives doing the same activities and avoiding change.
By allowing a change to be faced in people’s life and realizing that the new challenges and fears might obviously frighten them, a change might color their life. They, who are in line to have a change, understand more that the new success is from trying and doing new things with unpredictable answers are waiting for. In addition, those who are brave to encounter the new change is always to be the winner. For instance, there is a bus company in East Java which is less famous than any other bus companies due to the fear to maximize bus facilities. This costs much money to increase the facility in the bus. Other companies are brave to take some debts which lead them to be more success.
In contrary, there is an individual, people, or an organization who like doing the same thing day-to-day. By taking the similar activities, they feel comfortable, not much concentration and risks are needed. Moreover, they might argue that life is for happiness. The more happy you are, the more success you are in the future. Furthermore, they might say to not to experience risks because they are already satisfied to what they already own lately.
In conclusion, people might have a change by confronting to some risks. People might also avoid the risks and do the same thing. Then, people should consider which is the best to choose to their future life.
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Comments
Hi,Dhika. I’ve read this
Hi,Dhika.
I’ve read this essay. I think you should pay particular attention to what testbig suggests working for your essay.
To me, I want you to highlight the patterns below (re-write them):
- Some people in Indonesia.
- There is an individual, people, or an organization who like doing the same thing day-to-day.
- They feel comfortable, not much concentration and risks are needed.
- They might say to not to experience risks.
- People might also avoid the risks and do the same thing
Thanks heaps Mas. I'll try to
Thanks heaps Mas. I'll try to keep writing properly.... need hard work to do... :D
They, who are in line to have a change, understand more that the new success is from trying and doing new things with unpredictable answers are waiting for.
Suggestion: can you re-write this sentence?
flaws:
No. of Different Words: 146 200
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 78 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 80
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.889 21.0
Still have grammatical issues.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 286 350
No. of Characters: 1308 1500
No. of Different Words: 146 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.112 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.573 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.393 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 78 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 50 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 38 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.889 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.279 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.306 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.499 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.106 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5