"Ten years ago our company had two new office buildings constructed as regional headquarters for two regions. The buildings were erected by different construction companies — Alpha and Zeta. Although the two buildings had identical floor plans, the building constructed by Zeta cost 30 percent more to build. However, that building's expenses for maintenance last year were only half those of Alpha's. In addition, the energy consumption of the Zeta building has been lower than that of the Alpha building every year since its construction. Given these data, plus the fact that Zeta has a stable workforce with little employee turnover, we recommend using Zeta rather than Alpha for our new building project, even though Alpha's bid promises lower construction costs."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
It might be seen logical at a first glance to recommend the new building for the Alpha than the Zelta company. However, the conclusion given by the author is flawed. The author not only fails to address the how much cost had been occurred than the relative cost but also fails to address the live load and the exact numbers of the users that the building is used for. In addition to this the author has not take into account of the nature of the foundation of the structure and the external loads that caused for the maintenance the building.
To begin the conclusion the author has explained the cost of the building of the Zelta’s construction building has been 30% more than the Alpha Company. Similarly the author has explained the maintenance cost for the Zelta Company have been less than the Alpha Company. But author has not explained exactly by how much greater was the cost by the Alpha Company was for the building project. If the building maintenance was of supposed to be just 50 thousands and more than 75 thousands for the 10 million and 13 million building of the Zelta and the Alpha Company respectively. This would not be logically convincing for the authors conclusion.
Secondly, the author has not explained the reasons behind the maintenance of the building. The reasons may be of some external loads like wind loads, corrosion effect by the acidic environment conditions for the two buildings in the 2 regions. Similarly the live loads on the Alpha constructed building might have been more than the Zelta’s constructed building. Due to live load the fatigue on the building may have been seen.
- cfhg 16
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
No. of Words: 281 350
Minimum 3 arguments wanted.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 281 350
No. of Characters: 1318 1500
No. of Different Words: 115 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.094 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.69 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.487 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 85 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 71 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 47 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.615 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.793 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.846 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.456 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.456 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.174 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 204, Rule ID: THE_HOW[1]
Message: Did you mean 'how'?
Suggestion: how
...d. The author not only fails to address the how much cost had been occurred than the re...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 408, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'taken'.
Suggestion: taken
... In addition to this the author has not take into account of the nature of the found...
^^^^
Line 2, column 158, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Similarly,
...s been 30% more than the Alpha Company. Similarly the author has explained the maintenanc...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 630, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...uld not be logically convincing for the authors conclusion. Secondly, the author has n...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 244, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Similarly,
...for the two buildings in the 2 regions. Similarly the live loads on the Alpha constructed...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, as for, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 2.0 13.6137724551 15% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 5.0 28.8173652695 17% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 55.5748502994 50% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1349.0 2260.96107784 60% => More number of characters wanted.
No of words: 281.0 441.139720559 64% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.80071174377 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.09427095027 4.56307096286 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61476005588 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 115.0 204.123752495 56% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.409252669039 0.468620217663 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 401.4 705.55239521 57% => syllable counts are too short.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 19.7664670659 66% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.9455556375 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.769230769 119.503703932 87% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6153846154 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.76923076923 5.70786347227 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 5.15768463074 58% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.239848822368 0.218282227539 110% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0941631969665 0.0743258471296 127% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0635353909404 0.0701772020484 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170751662941 0.128457276422 133% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0382471984685 0.0628817314937 61% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.0 14.3799401198 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 48.3550499002 139% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 12.197005988 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.56 12.5979740519 84% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.32208582834 88% => OK
difficult_words: 47.0 98.500998004 48% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 12.5 12.3882235529 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Minimum four paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.