“In a recent survey of college graduates, 90 percent agreed that participating in an
internship increased their chances of finding a job after graduation, but last year, only 40
percent of Linford’s graduating art students had completed an internship. Skyway Designs,
located in nearby Linford City, is the perfect company for students to intern with for a
number of reasons: They offer internships in all of their departments, so every student is
sure to find work that they are interested in. Additionally, their internships offer flexible
working hours. Finally, Skyway Designs is known for being one of the best in the design
business, as over 80 percent of businesses in Linford City have used the services of
Skyway Designs for their design needs. Given the vital role that work experience plays in
a student’s success after graduation, we recommend that our art department require all art
students to complete an internship with Skyway Designs before graduation.”
In this letter, written by an alumni of Linford College to the chair of the art department, the writer recommends that all art students should be required to complete internships at Skyview Designs, a company in nearby Linford City. While at first glance this recommendation appears worthwhile, it operates on multiple assumptions, that if not sustained with more information, would significantly weaken the idea.
First of all, the writer assumes Skyview Designs is perfect because of their department flexibility. The author says that Skyview Designs offers internships in all of its departments, so that would work for every student. However, the writer does not say what the departments are. For example, if an art student focuses on sculpture and Skyview Designs does not have a sculpture department, then that would not likely work. From the name of the company, one gathers that it may be focused on graphic design, and not painting or sculpture, which would indicate it would not work for every student.
Second of all, the letter to the art chair, claims, with weak evidence, that Skyview Designs is the best in the business. It says that 80 percent of Linford City's businesses use it for their design needs. While this number is impressive at first glance, the writer does not offer further proof. For example, if Linford City is very small, then the number of businesses using Skyview Designs would be small. While Skyview Designs holds the overall business of Linford City, no information is given to the use of the company by other nearby towns.
Finally, there is an assumption is the argument the letter is founded on. Little is known about the survey of recent college graduates. The writer does not indicate if a reputable group did the survey, how many participated, or how many art students participated. It could have been mainly business students who responded to the survey and what is true for them, may not be true for art students. The writer also does not indicate the current placement of Linford College art graduates - perhaps they are successful in finding jobs or perhaps they are failing. This data is not provided.
In conclusion, it is possible that an internship will aid a students post-graduation success and it is also possible Skyview Designs may be a good fit for students. However, it is impossible to know without more concrete evidence. The argument presented is potentially specious. In order to improve it the writer should provide more substantial information on three fronts: one, more details on Skyview Design, two, better data on it's customer base, and three, add specifics on the survey mentioned. With these particulars, the argument could be convincing.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-10-13 | mahig2808@gmail.com | 58 | view |
| 2021-09-12 | Harshitha2623 | 60 | view |
| 2021-03-15 | Sudan Devkota | 50 | view |
| 2019-10-07 | moomin1 | 73 | view |
| 2019-09-27 | Lutfor Rahman Rony | 67 | view |
- Government officials should rely on their own judgment rather than unquestioningly carry out the will of the people whom they serve 75
- In a recent survey of college graduates 90 percent agreed that participating in an internship increased their chances of finding a job after graduation but last year only 40 percent of Linford s graduating art students had completed an internship Skyway D 73
- Some people believe that success in creative fields, such as painting, fiction writing, andfilmmaking, primarily requires hard work and perseverance. Others believe that suchsuccess mainly requires innate talents that cannot be learned. 58
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 447 350
No. of Characters: 2198 1500
No. of Different Words: 197 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.598 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.917 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.632 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 169 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 131 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 71 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.435 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.107 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.696 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.286 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.495 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.057 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 28, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an alumnus' or simply 'alumni'?
Suggestion: an alumnus; alumni
In this letter, written by an alumni of Linford College to the chair of the ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 59, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a student' or simply 'students'?
Suggestion: a student; students
...is possible that an internship will aid a students post-graduation success and it is also ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, however, if, may, second, so, then, while, for example, in conclusion, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.6327345309 127% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2282.0 2260.96107784 101% => OK
No of words: 447.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.10514541387 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.59808378696 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75263581792 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 204.123752495 105% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478747203579 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 685.8 705.55239521 97% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 53.9467286071 57.8364921388 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.2173913043 119.503703932 83% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.4347826087 23.324526521 83% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.5652173913 5.70786347227 80% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.146746612094 0.218282227539 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0446255391853 0.0743258471296 60% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0499267861751 0.0701772020484 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0907844790724 0.128457276422 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0487625331437 0.0628817314937 78% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 14.3799401198 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.3550499002 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.08 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.