The following is an excerpt from a speech given to the School Board about a change to the curriculum:
"Because the future will be dominated by technology, we must make four years of computer programming mandatory for all high school students. If our students take these classes, they’ll all be able to get high-paying programming jobs and lead fulfilling lives because software engineers and data scientists have the best job prospects and salaries. Therefore, we must educate our students so they can secure these kinds of jobs. Even if they pursue other careers, programming will still benefit them, given that all industries are becoming more technological."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
It is true that the rate of growth every year is much higher now than it was any time before in history. Helping their students be prepared for the society by the time they graduate, is a very big responsibilty the school bears.n It is justified for the school to morph its curriculum as per the demands of the industries, however, these changes must be manufactured based on accurate information and assumptions. The excerpt however, exhibits that this school fails to do so.
For students in their high school, with quite a few years left ahead of them to start interacting with the industries, it is but a hunch to expect the same technological prerequistes to exist even then as are existing now. It could also be a case that the student slog through four years of mandatory computer programming curriculum only to realise that the industries have declared those methods obsolete, introducing much simpler ways of achieving the same tasks without any programming. It is hence, very important to have the right survey of the requirements that industries are looking for now and find ways to extrapolate the nature of these requirements a few years in the future. Better yet, the curriculum needs to be modelled in a more arcihtecture level knowledge so as to allow them to be malleable to any technology that they might face. Although, this could require a lot of ofcu on just the computer subjects of their high school
Another issue with such a claim could be the issue of cutting back other subjects in order to accomodate these computer programming subjects. At formative years, so crucial to most teenagers in understanding what they want to choose their carrer paths to be, it becomes important to expose them to as many variants of subjects as possible, irrespective of the market demand, as it is true interest and passion towards a subject that allows students to flourish and enjoy their chosen career path. Hence, it should not be a case where other classes would have to be cut down to accomodate for four years of computer programming, which might not appeal to all students' interests. Perhaps, it would be more useful to shape each of these other classes such that the ways in which technology could be a part of these domains could be more coherently conveyed. For example, an art class could also be structured in a way to allow students to explore and play around with the various rendering softwares rather than forcing them to learn to program when all they want to do it with art and not engineering the softwares.
It is also a flawed assumption that all jobs in every fields will require the same kind of knowledge of computer programming that the school is planing on introducing. Many jobs as that of managerial positions, human resources, nurses, archeologists, the list can go on, where there might be a requirement to know the new technologies in the domain but they could be things that can be learnt on the job and a more important skill would be to retain and use the human touch to the way things are run. The school should make it a point to encourage all fields of work and maintain the respect for all jobs and not seem partial to only the ones up for grabs in the market.
We can also point another flaw in this excerpt that the school assumes the jobs of software engineers and data scientists could look forward to the best salaries. This can be countered with the many other managerial jobs that could offer a pay much higher than that of such engineers. It should also be noted that such assumptions on the paychecks are also dependent on the position of a person in that industry as not every position would pay better than a job in other domains in the same position.
In conclusion, while it is very important to keep the school curriculum as plastic as possible in order to best prepare the students for the industries and their dream jobs, it is also very important to make changes to these curriculum based on hard researched facts. Introducing a tedious program of four years of computer programming would require a lot more insight into how many and what are the other subjects that will need to be dropped to accommodate this, the extent to which the industry will still be dependent on the technologies planned to be a part of the curriculum and how far the students will be receptive towards this.
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2019-12-02 | zzk81 | 54 | view |
2019-11-11 | anirudh8860 | 63 | view |
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2019-10-08 | aishwaryasc | 69 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 765 350
No. of Characters: 3535 1500
No. of Different Words: 302 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.259 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.621 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.621 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 218 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 172 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 120 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 79 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.325 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.762 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.308 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.111 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 776, Rule ID: SO_AS_TO[1]
Message: Use simply 'to'
Suggestion: to
... in a more arcihtecture level knowledge so as to allow them to be malleable to any techn...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 852, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Although” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...to any technology that they might face. Although, this could require a lot of ofcu on ju...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 106, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this computer' or 'these computers'?
Suggestion: this computer; these computers
...k other subjects in order to accomodate these computer programming subjects. At formative year...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 485, Rule ID: AFFORD_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the infinitive: 'to career'
Suggestion: to career
...ents to flourish and enjoy their chosen career path. Hence, it should not be a case wh...
^^^^^^
Line 21, column 220, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this curriculum' or 'these curricula', 'these curriculums'?
Suggestion: this curriculum; these curricula; these curriculums
... also very important to make changes to these curriculum based on hard researched facts. Introdu...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, however, if, look, so, still, then, while, as to, for example, in conclusion, kind of, such as, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 40.0 19.6327345309 204% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 30.0 12.9520958084 232% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 24.0 13.6137724551 176% => OK
Pronoun: 64.0 28.8173652695 222% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 108.0 55.5748502994 194% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3611.0 2260.96107784 160% => OK
No of words: 765.0 441.139720559 173% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.72026143791 5.12650576532 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.25914758986 4.56307096286 115% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68283704177 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 312.0 204.123752495 153% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.407843137255 0.468620217663 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1104.3 705.55239521 157% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 14.0 4.96107784431 282% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 38.0 22.8473053892 166% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 80.8792155006 57.8364921388 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 180.55 119.503703932 151% => OK
Words per sentence: 38.25 23.324526521 164% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.2 5.70786347227 109% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.248171890174 0.218282227539 114% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0868473792603 0.0743258471296 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0508222352188 0.0701772020484 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.14827571033 0.128457276422 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0490071453892 0.0628817314937 78% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.9 14.3799401198 138% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.83 48.3550499002 103% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.8 12.197005988 130% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.69 12.5979740519 85% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.39 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 139.0 98.500998004 141% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 17.2 11.1389221557 154% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.