Writing Task 2
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Write about the following topic:
More children in developed countries are becoming overweight. This is a serious problem for wealthy countries.
Discuss some causes and effects of this problem. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
You should write at least 250 words
.
Admittedly, obesity among the juveniles in wealthy Nations are becoming trendy, this is a dangerous issue in the Country. Whereas, unhealthy dietary pattern and lack of exercise are the causes, however, development of food-related diseases, likewise mental disorders are the major effects.
On the one hand, children in developed kingdoms are seriously gaining excessive weight due to unsupervised eating habits, this is because of the fast foods outlets that are cheap, as parents are too busy to cook nutritious meals for them, parents buy these food for them because of its affordability. As an example, recent research concluded that, 85% children from affluence homes are grossly obese, as a result of excessive intake of junk foods, because their care givers are engaged in office work. Furthermore, another reason to developing overweight in children is sedentary lifestyle. Lack of exercise prone one to accumulating excess adipose tissues, which will increase the individual's body mass.
On the other hand, there are many result of obesity
is manifestation of food-related diseases like, juvenile diabetes, this is because the pancreas is unable to secret insulin: a hormone use to digest the excess carbohydrates that are ingested. For example, there are several cases of diabetes in children due to junk foods, nevertheless, another effect of overweight in juvenile is mental disorders like withdrawal to self as they are bigger than their counterparts. This creates social isolation which could bring about suicide ideation among them. For instance, a recent study in UK finds out that 75% of the suicide cases reported are due to unappreciated body sizes.
To conclude, obesity is becoming a trend among youngsters in wealthy societies, because of poor eating habits, lack of exercise, whereas, development of food-related ailments and manifestation of mental disorders are the major resultant effects.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2019-11-12 | Yinah Urom Basseyobot | 78 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
. Admittedly, obesity among the juve...
^
Line 9, column 252, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this food' or 'these foods'?
Suggestion: this food; these foods
... nutritious meals for them, parents buy these food for them because of its affordability....
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 286, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s buy these food for them because of its affordability. As an example, recent res...
^^
Line 13, column 30, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun result seems to be countable; consider using: 'many results'.
Suggestion: many results
...mass. On the other hand, there are many result of obesity is manifestation of food...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 52, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r hand, there are many result of obesity is manifestation of food-related diseas...
^^^^
Line 15, column 2, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Is
...d, there are many result of obesity is manifestation of food-related diseases ...
^^
Line 15, column 137, Rule ID: USE_TO_VERB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'used'?
Suggestion: used
... is unable to secret insulin: a hormone use to digest the excess carbohydrates that...
^^^
Line 15, column 373, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mental disorders like withdrawal to self as they are bigger than their counterpar...
^^
Line 19, column 80, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d among youngsters in wealthy societies, because of poor eating habits, lack of e...
^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, if, likewise, nevertheless, so, whereas, for example, for instance, as a result, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 13.1623246493 167% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 7.85571142285 25% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 10.4138276553 19% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 7.30460921844 82% => OK
Pronoun: 16.0 24.0651302605 66% => OK
Preposition: 45.0 41.998997996 107% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1645.0 1615.20841683 102% => OK
No of words: 296.0 315.596192385 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.55743243243 5.12529762239 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14784890444 4.20363070211 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.93558285957 2.80592935109 105% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 176.041082164 95% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.564189189189 0.561755894193 100% => OK
syllable_count: 529.2 506.74238477 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.60771543086 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 16.0721442886 68% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.2975951904 128% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 70.9446297888 49.4020404114 144% => OK
Chars per sentence: 149.545454545 106.682146367 140% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.9090909091 20.7667163134 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 10.9090909091 7.06120827912 154% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.01903807615 179% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.67935871743 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.149846580375 0.244688304435 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0594511687011 0.084324248473 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0424442045027 0.0667982634062 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0721958396958 0.151304729494 48% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0435422884568 0.056905535591 77% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 18.2 13.0946893788 139% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 28.17 50.2224549098 56% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.8 11.3001002004 140% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 15.26 12.4159519038 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.67 8.58950901804 113% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 78.4519038076 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 9.78957915832 148% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.1190380762 123% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 10.7795591182 148% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.