Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Nowadays, with the accelerating development of the society. People will need to face a large amount of the stresses from work and study. So the people always want to do some interesting things in their free time, like art or exercises.so it is essential to government spend more money on these projects. Consequently, some people believe that government should spent more money on arts. However, other people hold that the government should spend more money on the athletics. As far as i am concerned, I think that the government support on athletic is better than arts.
First of all, the government spent more money on the athletics, which can help people to improve their healthy level and improve working effectiveness.As far as we all knows, the body is the capital of revolution. So, doing some exercises can help people boost their immunity. Thus doing some exercises also can help people get a strong body and forget stresses.I mean the brain of human can secrete a kind of chemical things, when they do some athletic, which will improve the body metabolism. So wealth of toxic elements will remove from the body. Thus, people can be more healthy.In addition, if the people feel more healthy, they will work hard in their job. Then their working effectiveness will be improved.Consequently, it will help companies to get more money, then the government will have more money to spend on the athletic. In conclusion, it is a circulation for government.
Second, spending on athletic can help government to get more money and most people do not want to join the arts. The government conduct some activity about athletic like Olympic teams, which will help government to get more money. I mean people will buy the tickets about the activity, so the government can get money from these tickets. In addition, the activity can attract more people to visit the county and the tourist trade of the county will development. Thus the GDP of the government will skyrocket, then the government can use these money to support the athletic again.Moreover, studying arts need a large number of basement.So if the people learn the arts at the first time.They may believe that the arts are very elusive and alone.Thus their stresses will be increased. In conclusion, government do not spend extra money on the arts.\
Admittedly, I am not saying the athletics are impeccable.I believe that the athletics may have some risks. For example the government should spend too much money on the athletics like Olympic games.If may lead the tax of the workers to increase. So the worker may strike to protest the government.However, on balance, the issue aboves seem to minor factor in comparison with reporting back on what has been done. Because the risks in every field are can not be avoided, or the government can hold some small activity to avoid the problems.
In the nutshell, spending more money on the athletics not only can improve the working effectiveness but also it will get more benefits from the athletics.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Suggestion: I
... more money on the athletics. As far as i am concerned, I think that the governme...
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Suggestion: As
...level and improve working effectiveness.As far as we all knows, the body is the ca...
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Message: The pronoun 'we' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: 'know'
Suggestion: know
... working effectiveness.As far as we all knows, the body is the capital of revolution....
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Suggestion: I
...e get a strong body and forget stresses.I mean the brain of human can secrete a k...
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... body. Thus, people can be more healthy.In addition, if the people feel more healt...
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Suggestion: Consequently
... working effectiveness will be improved.Consequently, it will help companies to get more mon...
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Suggestion: Thus,
...t trade of the county will development. Thus the GDP of the government will skyrocke...
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Message: Did you mean 'this money' or 'these moneys', 'these monies'?
Suggestion: this money; these moneys; these monies
... skyrocket, then the government can use these money to support the athletic again.Moreover,...
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...ese money to support the athletic again.Moreover, studying arts need a large number of b...
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...etic again.Moreover, studying arts need a large number of basement.So if the people learn the art...
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...ng arts need a large number of basement.So if the people learn the arts at the fir...
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...ng arts need a large number of basement.So if the people learn the arts at the first ...
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...people learn the arts at the first time.They may believe that the arts are very elus...
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Suggestion: Thus
...hat the arts are very elusive and alone.Thus their stresses will be increased. In co...
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Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...hat the arts are very elusive and alone.Thus their stresses will be increased. In co...
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Suggestion: I
...not saying the athletics are impeccable.I believe that the athletics may have som...
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...ney on the athletics like Olympic games.If may lead the tax of the workers to incr...
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Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ney on the athletics like Olympic games.If may lead the tax of the workers to incr...
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Suggestion: However
...er may strike to protest the government.However, on balance, the issue aboves seem to m...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, however, if, may, moreover, second, so, then, thus, for example, i mean, i think, in addition, in conclusion, kind of, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 34.0 9.8082437276 347% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 43.0788530466 65% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 52.1666666667 113% => OK
Nominalization: 25.0 8.0752688172 310% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2507.0 1977.66487455 127% => OK
No of words: 506.0 407.700716846 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.95454545455 4.8611393121 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.7428307748 4.48103885553 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84743107694 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.416996047431 0.524837075471 79% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 768.6 618.680645161 124% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.0825720045 48.9658058833 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.0 100.406767564 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.08695652174 5.45110844103 130% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 19.0 5.5376344086 343% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.88709677419 102% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.217606543908 0.236089414692 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0812677162951 0.076458572812 106% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0637202300374 0.0737576698707 86% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.149078891406 0.150856017488 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0608471207807 0.0645574589148 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.9 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.43 10.9000537634 105% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.32 8.01818996416 91% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 10.002688172 70% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.