Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Children rely too much on technology, such as computers, smart phones, as well as video games for fun and entertainment.
Playing simpler toys or playing outside with friends would be better for children’s development.
New technologies are very interesting for children, and they like to allocate all of their free time to play video games, but parents should be aware of many problems that these new technologies may have. Although some people are of the opinion that these new kinds of stuff do not make any problems for their children, personally, I am on the side of people who strongly believe that children are too reliant on technology and they should spend more time playing with their friends. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, playing with other children rather than playing too many video games will improve children's social skills. To be more specific, smartphones and computers make such an interesting unreal world for children that they prefer to spend all of their times with them, and as a result, they do not have this chance to play with other children and improve some important skills, which are useful for their future. My own experience is a compelling example of what I mean. Twenty years ago, when I was a child, I used to stay at home and play video games. Moreover, my parent encouraged me to stay home and play, it was because it paved the way for them to looked after me and there were no needs to worry about me when I played outside with other children. Therefore, I missed a lot of useful things that I should learn when I was a teenager; hence, when I started my study at school I had a lot of problems communicating with other students, in fact, I was a shy person. It was because I did not have this chance to play with others and improve some useful abilities in my childhood.
Moreover, playing with other children will provide a chance for a child to improve their physical abilities. To put it in other words, playing will help children to have some useful physical activities. During a game, they may run and jump that develop their brain structure and make their muscles strong. For instance, as I mentioned in the example in the past paragraph, due to the face that during the period of before starting my school, I used to play more video game and stay at home rather than going out and play with other children, I was to fat compared to the other children, and I was not able to play with them in break times in our school. They play football and run, but I had not had any strong and powerful muscles that helped to play with them. Playing too many video games and stay at home made a lot of problems for me, and as a result, made me an introverted person that not only had a lot of problems communicating with others but was not able even to play with them.
In conclusion, according to all the reasons and examples, I believe that children should spend more time playing outside with their friends. This is because, not only this method will improve their social skills, but help them to have a strong body.
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2020-11-12 | Farahmad | 70 | view |
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, hence, if, look, may, moreover, so, therefore, as to, for instance, i feel, i mean, in conclusion, in fact, as a result, in other words, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 23.0 13.8261648746 166% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 11.0286738351 154% => OK
Pronoun: 74.0 43.0788530466 172% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 52.1666666667 144% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2382.0 1977.66487455 120% => OK
No of words: 530.0 407.700716846 130% => OK
Chars per words: 4.49433962264 4.8611393121 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.79809637944 4.48103885553 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.3815147855 2.67179642975 89% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 212.727598566 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.403773584906 0.524837075471 77% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 726.3 618.680645161 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.86738351254 375% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.6003584229 87% => OK
Sentence length: 29.0 20.1344086022 144% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 82.1644692066 48.9658058833 168% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.333333333 100.406767564 132% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.4444444444 20.6045352989 143% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.61111111111 5.45110844103 158% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.330768870695 0.236089414692 140% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.130971813535 0.076458572812 171% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0878552841533 0.0737576698707 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.223384739605 0.150856017488 148% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0712828929851 0.0645574589148 110% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.96 58.1214874552 101% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.2 10.1575268817 120% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.35 10.9000537634 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.22 8.01818996416 90% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 86.8835125448 83% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 18.5 10.002688172 185% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 10.0537634409 135% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.