Medical experts say that only one quarter of Corpora's citizens meet the current standards for adequate fitness
The health magazine published in Corpora states that declining economy is major factor for inadeqate fitness of Corpora's citizens. This statement is supported by the fact that people our not spending on fitness-related products. However these arguments are based on flawed assumptions and to prove them right the author needs to clarify on following three scenarios.
First of all, the medical fitness of people is measured after a span of twenty years. Perhaps the medical tests done by the experts are more rigorous than the test done twenty years before. Further the medical standards require may be different today due to increase pollution in the environment. Suppose a person was able to run a 20 miles marathon twenty years before, the same person may not be able to run 20 miles in todays extreme climate changes. These assumptions are needed to be clarified to make sure that the data is appropriate to compare the declined fitness levels of citizens of Corpora.
Secondly, the argument mentions that certain region having comparatively more usage of computer yet show highestlevel of fitness. Maybe these results are because this region have the maximum number of gardens, pools, and playgroundsin comparison to the other regions of Corpora. Since presence of these spaces are so easier is the reason for the better fitness of people in the region.
Lastly, the low expenditure on fitness-products is perhaps caused by the increased prices of them and it may have nothing to do with the economy. Maybe people thought instead of spending extravagently on these product the pragmatic thing is to buy a gym memberships.
So as long as the author fails to clarify above mentioned flaws the argument made is under the water and the relation between the declining economy and people's fitness cannot be co-realted.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2023-01-05 | Pranav Lohote | 62 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 298 350
No. of Characters: 1498 1500
No. of Different Words: 170 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.155 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.027 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.711 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 50 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 31 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.286 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.006 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.323 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.323 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.07 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 230, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...t spending on fitness-related products. However these arguments are based on flawed ass...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 205, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this product' or 'these products'?
Suggestion: this product; these products
...ht instead of spending extravagently on these product the pragmatic thing is to buy a gym mem...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, however, if, lastly, may, second, secondly, so, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.9520958084 31% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 4.0 13.6137724551 29% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 15.0 28.8173652695 52% => OK
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1530.0 2260.96107784 68% => OK
No of words: 298.0 441.139720559 68% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.13422818792 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15483772266 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76830790735 2.78398813304 99% => OK
Unique words: 172.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.577181208054 0.468620217663 123% => OK
syllable_count: 486.9 705.55239521 69% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 26.9701270872 57.8364921388 47% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 109.285714286 119.503703932 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.2857142857 23.324526521 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.78571428571 5.70786347227 84% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.151757796502 0.218282227539 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0535950634262 0.0743258471296 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0475797139162 0.0701772020484 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0719553942785 0.128457276422 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0442553623853 0.0628817314937 70% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 14.3799401198 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.47 12.5979740519 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.13 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 98.500998004 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.