Too much attention is paid to and too much money is spent on keeping pets, while people throughout the world are starving
Discuss the arguments for and again keeping pets
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowlege or experience
Whether or not people should spend a large amount of money on continuing keeping pets although a huge number of population in the world has coped with starvation to be a hotly debated issue. There are those who argue that keeping pets brings to many benefits. To my mind, this issue has both positive and negative effects.
First of all, keeping animals has brought to many beneficial things. It could be argued that animals are regarded as closed friends to be near us. Life is always under severe pressure with sedentary jobs so keeping animals is considered as a way of reducing stress at home. Some people believe that it is impoverished to live without keeping animals because they feel more comfortable to take their dog or cat to walk around in the park and they both relax and do physical excerise. In recent researchs, some studies indicate that people who keep pets, these people would live longer than those who do not do this because pets help us to have relaxed atmosphere after stressful working hours at office.
However, some others do not feel like keeping pets because they claim that it is essential to save much more money to help people who are suffered from the starvation. It may be more meaningful than spending too much money on looking after pets. What is more, people who support for this viewpoint to believe that the potential seriousness of the animals is infectious diseases to be spread over not only all members of the family but also the whole community. The consequence of this, it can cause many deaths for people. For example, in 2007 my uncle died of a serious disease due to keeping a cat.
From my view, it is unacceptable to keep pets because it costs both a sum of money and takes more time to look after him or her. Therefore, people should save up money for helping to lift impoverished people out of poverty as well as starvation. It may be a realistic purpose.
It seems to me that people should not spend too much money and time on keeping animals. It is essential to save money for doing charity by helping poor people. This makes a great contribution to the society instead of looking after pets.
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Sentence: Some people believe that it is impoverished to live without keeping animals because they feel more comfortable to take their dog or cat to walk around in the park and they both relax and do physical excerise.
Error: excerise Suggestion: exercise
flaws:
The fourth and fifth paragraph are duplicated. One of them is enough.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 382 350
No. of Characters: 1731 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.421 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.531 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.369 2.4
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No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 84 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.105 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.01 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.474 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.52 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.097 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5