The idea of having single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life.
How people think of happy life becomes a main reason for this difference. These paragraphs will discuss the topic more detail.
Firstly, the leisure time for people who have only one job is much more than those who have many jobs. There is no problem that their income is low as long as there is more leisure time although some people argue that this thought is old fashioned. Single-career persons prefer not to spend much time for work because they have family who need their attention. The true happiness is not entirely about money as many people think. Nevertheless, family becomes an important part of life. Spending more time with them is the most essential part of enjoying life.
However, people deciding to have only one career conceivably pose a considerable risk due to restrictive income. Therefore, new deliberation considered as the more appropriate way is to own more than one career. People following this idea believe that many careers enable to increase money they earn. Money is probably their symbol of triumph. Thus, by earning much money it is possible for them to purchase and act everything that they really want to their family's happiness. Even though they have to work more than 15 hours everyday, it does not matter because of relatives.
As mentioned in the previous paragraphs, though single-career person has much leisure time, they have a meager salary which is inadequate to meet with all their needs. On the other hand, due to insufficient leisure time, having many careers possibly causes unbearable stress and worsens health. According to other people's arguments, to reach excellent quality of life, with high wage and free-stressful life, is needed high education level that ensures to achieve top management.
Ultimately, starting own business which employs other people is the best way to reach both good health and leisure time.
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flaws:
No. of Words: 308 350
No. of Different Words: 175 200
You don't talk about 'further education will be something that continues throughout life.'
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 308 350
No. of Characters: 1527 1500
No. of Different Words: 175 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.189 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.958 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.511 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 105 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 74 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 33 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.279 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.333 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.316 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.533 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5