INTEGRATED ESSAY-
SUMMARIZE THE POINTS MADE IN THE LECTURE, BEING SURE TO EXPLAIN HOW THEY CHALLENGE SPECIFIC POINTS MADE IN THE READING PASSAGE.(the passage and the lecture are about a business
The lecture states about the issues of security in different types of business, namely; franchise,independent business and pre owned independent businesses.Generally it is believed that franchise is the best business but finding shows that it's not.As they buy specific goods and services which are overpriced and not allowed to buy it themselves.Again they pay 6% of their total sum for advertisement but the advertisement is not for their business.They get very little benefit than the independent businesses.But, the biggest issue in independent business is the security.So, overall the pre-owned business is the best one as it has much chances to succeed twice the time the previous owner had.
In contrast to that the passage supports the advantages of franchise.As it saves money in advertisement .It is beneficial because it already has a brand name and security of less failure.Also the passage shows the risk and insecurities of independent business.
Although the lecture agrees with the passage regarding the greater risk in independent business and less risk of franchise business, basing on the studys' finding, it challenges the independence of franchise business.Like it doesn't have the independence of advertising and buying goods and services on it's own choice.The franchise owner force them to buy some specific goods and sevices which are overpriced.
Another point based on the findings the lecture states an additional information about the buy already existing business and it's benefits.In addition to that, it states that pre-owned business has the chance to give twice of the benefits than it's previous status, which is not mentioned in the passage.
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flaws:
Not well organized.
The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Don't need to reiterate the contents of reading passages.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 18 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 5 10
No. of Words: 273 250
No. of Characters: 1387 1200
No. of Different Words: 128 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.065 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.081 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.818 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 87 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 35 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.645 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 1 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.57 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.905 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.187 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4