Integrated writing task
The reading passage is about a research done on parenting in regard to some strategies used by parents for disciplining. The listening passage supports the information that is mentioned in the reading passage, in addition to further details.
According to the reading passage, parents usually conform three strategies to discipline their kids. First of all, the power strategy by which parents use physical punishment, either by spanking or taking away privileges. Inspite of the consequences of this strategy, which is fear and hatred to parents,as well as aggression in children, It still renders one of the highest strategies performed by parents. Secondly,the withholding of affection strategy by which parents refuse communication with the child. Although this strategy would promote a well disciplined child, nevertheless, this child would always be characterized with nervesnous and insecureness. Finally , the management technique strategy which by parents usually set rules that are age appropriate. Moreover, they praise their child, provide him with reasons and explainations at all times.
The professor in the listening passage claims that the power and withholding of affection strategies often result in low self esteem children. Meanwhile, the management technique strategy results in high self esteem individuals. He also adds that some psychologists oppose physical punishment for children under two years. while others believe that this strategy should not be used for all ages. The professor also mentions that most psychologist agree that the management technique strategy is the most effective one, and that parents should always try to catch the right behaviour of their kids, and give them positive reinforcement on such behaviour.
In conclusion, both the reading passage and the listening passage explain about the strategies that are used by parents to maintain discipline in their children, referring to the management technique strategy as the best method.
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Sentence: Moreover, they praise their child, provide him with reasons and explainations at all times.
Error: explainations Suggestion: explanations
flaws:
You should not take one paragraph for the reading passage. The integrated writing task is mainly for the content of lecture. The pattern is like this:
para 1: the lecture is casting doubt on reading (or agree on reading sometimes)
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
It doesn't need a conclusion.
Read standard answers from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 300 250
No. of Characters: 1651 1200
No. of Different Words: 148 120
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.162 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.503 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.897 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 113 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.407 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.786 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.565 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.135 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4