Some young children spend a great amount of their time practicing sports. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Some people know that today healthy in their life have an important point. They control the menu for breakfast and dinner, and arrange time to practice at least once time a day. It does not occur in adult people but also children do that thing because young children in modern era concern a lot about it. While others still enjoy their life with eating junk food and playing games when they have leisure time.
Practicing sport is really good for health and make people live more longer. It becomes concern for children because so many advertisement appear the dangerous of unhealthy life. Sometimes they do many practice every day such as jogging in the morning before go to school, playing badminton in afternoon after back from school, and practicing basketball in evening. Hence, their part of time was spent for practicing, so they do not enough time to study and do their homework. However, the disease go far away from children’ body.
Pay more attention to do a lot of practicing can make children have soft skill beside their academic skill in school. They become an athlete for sport which they like the most like a runner. They prove that they get medal for championship which held by other country. But, the more they do exercise, sometimes they loss to manage time for eating. When they felt tired, they laid on bed and slept. So they were not hungry and it makes the immune system of body decreases. Hence, they becomes sick.
Despite of more advantages for practicing a lot in sports, the effect makes children lazy to do anything. They will not complete their task well, become late to go to school, and even sleep at school time. It will be concerned by mother to tell this act to the students. If this behavior continue, they will get low score on academic. Students should realize it and balance between sports and assignment.
To sum up, practicing sport is really essential for children’ health, they can develop soft skill and live more longer. On the other hand, they forget to eat and become ill every time.
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Sentence: Practicing sport is really good for health and make people live more longer.
Suggestion: Practicing sport is really good for health and makes people live much longer.
Sentence: It becomes concern for children because so many advertisement appear the dangerous of unhealthy life.
Description: The fragment advertisement appear the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace advertisement with advertisements
Sentence: Hence, they becomes sick.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to they and becomes
Sentence: If this behavior continue, they will get low score on academic.
Description: The fragment behavior continue , is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace continue with continues
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.478 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.492 7.5
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.012 0.07
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 356 350
No. of Characters: 1630 1500
No. of Different Words: 190 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.344 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.579 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.184 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 66 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 42 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 15.478 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.492 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.652 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.263 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.466 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.012 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5