In your country, is there more need for land to ne left in its natural condition or is there more need for land to be developed for housing and industry?

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In your country, is there more need for land to ne left in its natural condition or is there more need for land to be developed for housing and industry?

Although, once, in my country there were too much need for housing and people started to develop their structures and factories into nature, now it is extremely felt that lands should be left to improve the natural condition in my country. The forests, jungles, and water sources like rivers and seas are being dangerous by human activities and their constructions, in particular. In addition, wild animals are threatening to extinct because of losing their own nature in my country.

The natural sources of my country are in danger of expunging. The overpopulation during the last years leaded to the destruction of the natural fields like jungles, forests, mountains, seas, and so forth. At the time, the uses of land for housing were felt a necessity. But, over time, the greed of people for gaining and taking advantage of whole nature was allowed them to damage nature in any possible way. Now, all virgin fields of environment are occupied by the manufactures, houses, and various industrial constructions which not only destroyed the nature, but also threaten our life by extracting lots of pollution. As a result, there is definitely more need to stop some unnecessary activities of human and preserve the lands for nature.

Second, the wildlife in the country has the terrible situation because of the activities of people. Every year, it is heard that numerous varieties of animals such as birds, fish, and mammals are perished. In fact, loses of nature and bio me for wildlife cause that they cannot tolerate the awful condition made by human and be extinct. In stances, the trees in northern jungles, as the place of myriad animals, are cutting and firing by progressive acts of people and our seas and lake, as the living place of fish, are being dried by people for achieving the vacant land to construct, too. Therefore, we are unconsciously or cautiously diminishing all sources for the animals which are the principles resources of our wildlife. No doubt, it is the time of being aware of our influences on the environment and doing something in favor of it and releasing the lands for the nature will be minimum work for this goal.

To the best of my knowledge, as an environmental engineer, quitting land to save nature is a must for my country because nature and wildlife are being abolished by human activities for reaching the more land.

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Average: 8 (2 votes)
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Comments

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 24 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 399 350
No. of Characters: 1908 1500
No. of Different Words: 197 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.469 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.782 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.642 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 136 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 64 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.938 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.965 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.494 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.071 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5

Hi, please give me some advice? ...I would be disappointed because of being stable in the scores gotten on my writings..
I want that you explain, for example, why this writing scored 24, not 30?
I don't know why? Is it because of the number of paragraphs? or maybe because of my idea on that... or another issue?

1. Still have grammatical issues. They are hidden and hard to find. Can you figure them out and re-write those sentence?

In fact, loses of nature and bio me for wildlife cause that they cannot tolerate the awful condition made by human and be extinct.

No doubt, it is the time of being aware of our influences on the environment and doing something in favor of it and releasing the lands for the nature will be minimum work for this goal.

2. You have another flaw:
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12

Check out online to see what is Discourse Markers.