The Quiot industries takes the decision of shortening their work shift by one hour in order to increase the productivity and decrease the number of accidents. This decision was taken by comparing the other industry where the work hours are less by one hour and less accidents. But direct comparison of the two industries would not be valid as there are certain assumptions which should be considered to make the argument more cogent and valid. It is not stated in the memo as which type of industries do the two industries the panoply and Quiot belong. Along with that the surrounding of the industries the facilities, the place where the industries are located are not described. The type of machines used and the information about the timing of the shift is not
detailed properly. Thus certain assumptions are requisite to make the memo succinct.
Firstly, it is required to be assumed that the two industries work differently and produce different type of components or services. The Quoit manufacturing may be assumed as to be making more heavy, hazardous parts such as large metal parts or pernicious chemicals, due to which more incident of accidents are taking place. On the other hand panoply industry may be manufacturing smaller light weight and less hazardous components so owing to less dangers. In addition to that it may also be assumed that surroundings of the two industries are different in the sense that the Quoit industry is located in a squalid region due to which employees may have harmful effects on their health leading to increase in the number of accidents. In contrast to that the panoply industry may be located in a clean and sophisticated area.
Secondly, Both the industries may have different types of rules and regulation, it may be assumed that the Quiot manufacturing industry may have stringent regulations regarding the free time available to the employees for rest which may lead to the exhaustion of the employees and increase in the number of accidents. It may also be assumed that the facilities provided by the two industries to thei employees such as canteen, pantry, type of workplace and its characteristics such as dimly lit room, small area, and more ratio of machine in a given area which also results into accidents.
Finally, It may well be assumed that the Quiot industries allow the employees to work in double shifts and along with that the timings of day and night are even not fixes which may lead to sleep deprivation and tiredness leading to accidents.
Thus to sum up it will not be beneficial for the quiot industry to lessen the shift timings by one hour if certain assumptions are not brought into light and also the comparison of the two industries is not relevant if certain assumption are not taken into account.
- When Stanley Park first opened, it was the largest, most heavily used public park in town. It is still the largest park, but it is no longer heavily used. Video cameras mounted in the park's parking lots last month revealed the park's drop in popularity: 79
- 32. The following appeared in a memo from a vice president of Quiot Manufacturing.During the past year, Quiot Manufacturing had 30 percent more on-the-job accidents than at the nearby Panoply Industries plant, where the work shifts are one hour shorter th 62
- Argument Type - The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site. "The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at a 29
- The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council."An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study repor 52
- Governments should place few, if any, restrictions on scientific research and development.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In deve 66
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
1. the introduction is too long
2. Need to argue against the conclusion always. For this topic it is:
Therefore, to reduce the number of on-the-job accidents at Quiot and thereby increase productivity, we should shorten each of our three work shifts by one hour so that employees will get adequate amounts of sleep.
----------------------
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 472 350
No. of Characters: 2275 1500
No. of Different Words: 186 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.661 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.82 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.735 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 142 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 124 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 91 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 66 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.153 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.376 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.581 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.11 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 60, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s takes the decision of shortening their work shift by one hour in order to incre...
^^
Line 1, column 263, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun accidents is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...the work hours are less by one hour and less accidents. But direct comparison of the...
^^^^
Line 2, column 20, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...of the shift is not detailed properly. Thus certain assumptions are requisite to ma...
^^^^
Line 4, column 390, Rule ID: LIGHT_WEIGHT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'lightweight'?
Suggestion: lightweight
...y industry may be manufacturing smaller light weight and less hazardous components so owing ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 445, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun dangers is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...d less hazardous components so owing to less dangers. In addition to that it may als...
^^^^
Line 6, column 507, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...cteristics such as dimly lit room, small area, and more ratio of machine in a giv...
^^
Line 10, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
... and tiredness leading to accidents. Thus to sum up it will not be beneficial for...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, firstly, if, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, thus, well, as to, in addition, in contrast, such as, in contrast to, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 28.0 19.6327345309 143% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 19.0 11.1786427146 170% => OK
Relative clauses : 19.0 13.6137724551 140% => OK
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 55.5748502994 112% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2322.0 2260.96107784 103% => OK
No of words: 472.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 4.91949152542 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6610686524 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79636298343 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.39406779661 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 720.9 705.55239521 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 29.0 22.8473053892 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 75.5686515279 57.8364921388 131% => OK
Chars per sentence: 145.125 119.503703932 121% => OK
Words per sentence: 29.5 23.324526521 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 11.0 5.70786347227 193% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.169905980593 0.218282227539 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.076927879208 0.0743258471296 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0476664057789 0.0701772020484 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0992661698553 0.128457276422 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0614576853938 0.0628817314937 98% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.5 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.5 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.85 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 90.0 98.500998004 91% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.6 11.1389221557 122% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.