The following is a recommendation from the board of Directors of Monach Books.
"We recommend that Monach Books open a cafe in its store. Monach, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is know for its wide selection books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the cafe would attract more customers. Space could be made for the cafe by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a cafe will allow Monarch to attracr more customers and better complete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own cafe.
Question: Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
Monarch store may well be the best store that sells books which contains all the subjects. The author of this article makes a number of unsubstantiated assumptions, based on this assumptions the author makes a strong proposal for opening cafes in the store. This may be a good and possitive demand but it may fail to achieve this puppose or even have the perverse effect of worsening the possitive attributes of the cafe.
The author's first mistake is to assume why the cafe has more customers in the recent years. She claimed that it is because of its known for for wide selection books on all subjects require in schools. This is a classic case of confusing correlation with causation. Yes, Monarch cafe may have the best books for sell for students to buy, but that could not be the reason behind its large number of population. For instance, customers may be coming to Monarch to buy books because its close to their resident, or because of its low cost of sell.
The claim that opening a cafe will attract more customersby discountinuing childrens section, is totally unsupported. Their is no need to discountinue the section and thinking that this will help to foster the growth of the store. In fact, if customers have to be attracted to the store, their could be some other reasons or the one being mentioned above.
The conclusion that opening caves will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Bools cafe which has opened is unsubstantiated. In fact this is unsupported. Their is no good reason to believe that this stratagy will alliviate the progress of the cafe. Without. Finding any tangible fact that showed the increase in customers in Renege cafe. People may be attracted to the cafe because of its customer care service or even discount in sells price.
Ironically, if the author is right that opening of cafe will attract customers to Monarch store Books. She may be rong in her assessment. A book store now turned part of its space to a cage. The author seems to seek the impossible-a store to a cafe.
Despite the flaws in this authors argument, she may be correct in her assessment on why their are increase in customers in recent years. She could strengthen her argument by providing its most important premise of data. For example, by providing a survey from recent customers who buy books in the store; asking them why they do come to the store? Is it because of its best books sells in all subjects? Or because its near to their home town? Her argument could have being more persuasive. Were this the case, her call for opening cafe in Monarch Book Store might be justified.
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Sentence: The author of this article makes a number of unsubstantiated assumptions, based on this assumptions the author makes a strong proposal for opening cafes in the store.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to this and assumptions
Sentence: She claimed that it is because of its known for for wide selection books on all subjects require in schools.
Description: The token for is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to for and for
Sentence: Yes, Monarch cafe may have the best books for sell for students to buy, but that could not be the reason behind its large number of population.
Description: The word sell is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Sentence: For instance, customers may be coming to Monarch to buy books because its close to their resident, or because of its low cost of sell.
Description: The word sell is not usually used as a noun, singular, common
Sentence: Their is no need to discountinue the section and thinking that this will help to foster the growth of the store.
Description: The tag a determiner, possessive is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Refer to Their and is
Sentence: In fact, if customers have to be attracted to the store, their could be some other reasons or the one being mentioned above.
Description: A determiner, possessive is not usually followed by a modal auxillary
Suggestion: Refer to their and could
Sentence: Their is no good reason to believe that this stratagy will alliviate the progress of the cafe.
Description: The tag a determiner, possessive is not usually followed by is
Suggestion: Refer to Their and is
Sentence: People may be attracted to the cafe because of its customer care service or even discount in sells price.
Description: The token in is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to in and sells
Sentence: People may be attracted to the cafe because of its customer care service or even discount in sells price.
Description: The token in is not usually followed by a verb, present tense, 3rd person singular
Suggestion: Refer to in and sells
Sentence: This may be a good and possitive demand but it may fail to achieve this puppose or even have the perverse effect of worsening the possitive attributes of the cafe.
Error: puppose Suggestion: purpose
Error: possitive Suggestion: positive
Sentence: Their is no good reason to believe that this stratagy will alliviate the progress of the cafe.
Error: alliviate Suggestion: alleviate
Error: stratagy Suggestion: strategy
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.464 21.0
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 28 15
No. of Words: 461 350
No. of Characters: 2125 1500
No. of Different Words: 200 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.634 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.61 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.492 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 132 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 63 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.464 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.317 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.429 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.287 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.485 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5