Educational institutions should actively encourage their students to choose fields of study that will prepare them for lucrative careers.
Write a response in which you discuss your views on the policy and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider the possible consequences of implementing the policy and explain how these consequences shape your position.
Regarding that the students will attain rich lives, the author argues that educational institutions should actively encourage their students to choose fields of study that will prepare them for lucrative careers. It's sound good, however,meticulous analysis will find many flaws of the claim.
First of all, I wonder whether professors in educational institutions have abilities to foresee the future development of a field? The good income in a certain field of study now doesn't mean that it can still keep the situation. For example, about the computer field, in China, as a new field of study,it attained most of people's pursuing. They thought that learning this amount to lucrative careers. However, with the increasing number of the students are studing it, the competition become more and more serious. For some students, they cannot find a job, let alone having a lucrative career in future.
Admittedly, choosing a lucrative field of study, students may earn a lot of money and their material lives will also be rich. However, whether working in a lucrative field means everyone can have a high level of income which also depend on their own abilities. Moreover, choosing a field of study not only need to consider income, but also necessary for students to think whether they adopt to work in the field. Many people work in banks where close to money and surely that they can earn a lot of money. Recently ,a investigate shows that the mean income of a years for these workers working in bank is 20 million. However, for some people working in the field, big pressure loss their happy and overwhelming them.
Encourage their students to choose fields of study that will prepare them for lucrative careers can also lead to a worse situation that there are few people to do those crucial but income relatively lower works. Imagine that nearly all the people do management work in offices, but garbage is teen with the street.
In sum, I think that it's not wise for educational institutions actively encourage their students to choose fields of study that will prepare them for lucrative careers.
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Sentence: However, for some people working in the field, big pressure loss their happy and overwhelming them.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a pronoun, personal, accusative
Suggestion: Refer to overwhelming and them
Sentence: However, with the increasing number of the students are studing it, the competition become more and more serious.
Error: studing Suggestion: No alternate word
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 355 350
No. of Characters: 1710 1500
No. of Different Words: 168 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.341 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.817 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.465 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 85 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 56 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.882 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.351 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.765 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.349 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.099 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5