The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The memo of director asserts that Buckingham college should build a number of new dormitories to accommodate and attract more student in the college. To make this argument, he assumes that housing rent of the town outside the will stay hike and students will be attracted to cheaper housing facilities of college . I found this argument irrational because it rests upon several faulty assumptions.
Firstly, the director assumes that students will keep coming on the college in the same rate as it is now and predicts that number of student will be double in next fifty years. The source of that data is still unknown. And let us assume that present rate is increasing, what is the main cause that makes student keep coming in the same rate as it is today. Without mentioning any plausible reason he makes prediction that number will increase. Author would have given a plausible source of data or prediction there to make it more justifiable.
Secondly, the director makes assumption that establishing such residency will attract more student to the college. As a matter of fact, many students chose college by closely examine faculties and course experts that they are willing to pursue rather than just watching luxurious dormitories. Thus, making prediction that student will increase by double of the figure that campus has for now on the basis of such assumption seems spurious. Thus, if college really want to increase the student, it just have to focus on strength of faculty and resources that helps to crease sturdy academic environment rather than focusing on luxuries.
Thirdly, director assumes that hike on average rent on the town will long last without any evidence to prove it. Such prediction made his stance weak that people will choose on campus apartment for their residency. That is actually fallacious assumption. Town planner might have been thinking to settle price of apartment rent to the normal so that a general people can afford it. And there is not any such clue to support director's assume that campus can distribute residency among the students on the lower price than the town apartments. Rather, director would have conducted the study prior to make such claim.
In conclusion, director's argument that building a number of new dormitories that can offer student housing in low price than town and this will help to increase the number of student who enroll in the college is unjustifiable. To strength the argument, the director would have provided strong evidence that college can offer cheaper residency to students and stronger promise to increase strength of faculty of campus.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- not OK
argument 3 -- not OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: ??? out of 6
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 432 350
No. of Characters: 2150 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.559 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.977 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.494 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 166 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 77 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 40 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.789 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.45 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.305 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.525 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.074 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 245, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... the town outside the will stay hike and students will be attracted to cheaper h...
^^
Line 1, column 273, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tay hike and students will be attracted to cheaper housing facilities of colleg...
^^
Line 1, column 307, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...racted to cheaper housing facilities of college . I found this argument irration...
^^
Line 1, column 316, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...o cheaper housing facilities of college . I found this argument irrational becaus...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, but, first, firstly, if, really, second, secondly, so, still, third, thirdly, thus, as for, in conclusion, such as, as a matter of fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 22.0 13.6137724551 162% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 28.8173652695 132% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2198.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 432.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08796296296 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.57114938646 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.460648148148 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 676.8 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.2758391278 57.8364921388 87% => OK
Chars per sentence: 109.9 119.503703932 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.6 23.324526521 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.25 5.70786347227 127% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.176303601793 0.218282227539 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0575341211617 0.0743258471296 77% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0843241357124 0.0701772020484 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.117072095043 0.128457276422 91% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0805261677653 0.0628817314937 128% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 48.3550499002 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 12.5979740519 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.71 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 98.500998004 84% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.