Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family we just watch television.
It is true that watching television is not good for community growth because the relationship among family will broke. While I agree with the statement, I believe that television is not the reason of broken family because there are plenty of advantages from television.
Some people think that television is harmful due to the some reasons. It makes people become individual person because the existence of television in every house will encourage them to stay at home. If people spend all the time for staying at home to watch television, they will rarely to visit their family or neighbor. In result, the relationship among family will damage. Then, television brings negative effect for family life because it derives people to the assumptions that relatives are not necessary since they can get everything from television, for instance, when they are bored they can watch entertainment program which are showed in television rather than meet to other families for conducting discussion. Next, when they need information or solution in solving a problem, they do not involve family to help them because they can overcome the problem by following the program which is related to their case. Consequently, there is no harmony in family.
On the other hand, there are several reasons why television does not destroy family life. Moreover, it brings advantages. Firstly, watching television does not break the relationship since people can watch it wherever they are, so they will not always stuck at home, for example, when they visit their family, they can talk while they are watching television. They can do those activities in the same time. It means that they are not only able to maintain the socialization but also watch their favorite. Secondly, television’s program can be taken as a topic for discussions, for example, when people meet their family, they can talk about actual news, hot issue, or gossip which are published in television. Their conversation will be nice because they talk something in a top rate in television. In result, they relationship among family become closer.
For the reasons mentioned above, television will not cause broken family, but it drives positive effect in which people get information from television and it can be a topic to be discussed which can create happy family.
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relationship among family will broke
relationship among family will break
Sentence: Then, television brings negative effect for family life because it derives people to the assumptions that relatives are not necessary since they can get everything from television, for instance, when they are bored they can watch entertainment program which are showed in television rather than meet to other families for conducting discussion.
Description: The fragment entertainment program which is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Sentence: In result, they relationship among family become closer.
Description: A pronoun, personal, nominative, not 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to they and relationship
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 378 350
No. of Characters: 1893 1500
No. of Different Words: 173 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.409 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.008 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.609 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 133 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 89 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 47 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.991 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.353 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.48 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5