Do you agree or disagree? People gain more happiness from their jobs than their social life.

By and large, profession has played a prevailing role in people's life through history. There are a plethora of people who are in the conviction that more happiness can be obtained from people's jobs. While others take a radically different point of view asserting that social life can bring more happiness comparing to one's job. To the extent that my personal perspective is concerned I accord with the first group. Among countless reasons that give adherence to my opinion, I will delve into the most important ones.
Firstly, we spend a huge amount of our time working. Doing what you are passionate about can soar up your self-satisfaction level which is severely tied up to your happiness. For example, my job as a salesman of a multinational company requires to travel abroad often. In other words I have to spare my free times in order to get the job done. But that special moment, when dopamine dosage reaches to the highest level and you know for a fact that you have sold over one million dollar in just one month is not comparable to any other moment. I am literally in love with what I do and therefor can't get enough of it. The moments when you are at home doing nothing but to hang around with friends and family seem worthless moments to me. They commence absolutely nothing and result no more than a bit of drama, at their best.
Secondly, the social comparison is an indispensable element when it comes to happiness. Happiness is a subjective matter and if one feels down in comparison to others, since his vocation is not so lucrative or decent, happiness can fade away easily. Satisfaction in work place can breed depression in social life. Though it seems farfetched that the satisfaction with the career would result oppositely on social life. For example my little brother, who works in a dead end job as he describes, feels blue whenever we're in a party together. Since the social status of his job is not so appealing, he feels belittled and humiliated. The gap in payment and social capital he sees in comparisons to youngsters in his age makes him depressed and influences his social life.

In short, all the aforementioned reasons and explanations leads to the conclusion that people can gain more happiness from their jobs than their social life, for we spend a tremendous amount of time working and the satisfaction of job can lead to happiness in all areas of a person's life style. Where the opposite direction seems a bit implausible.

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Average: 9 (1 vote)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 200, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ness can be obtained from peoples jobs. While others take a radically different point...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 319, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...e can bring more happiness comparing to ones job. To the extent that my personal per...
^^^^
Line 2, column 246, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'traveling', 'travelling'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'require' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: traveling; travelling
...man of a multinational company requires to travel abroad often. In other words I have to ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 595, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...lly in love with what I do and therefor cant get enough of it. The moments when you ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 315, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Though” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ce can breed depression in social life. Though it seems farfetched that the satisfacti...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 276, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...can lead to happiness in all areas of a persons life style. Where the opposite directio...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 296, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Where” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...s in all areas of a persons life style. Where the opposite direction seems a bit impl...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, second, secondly, so, while, for example, in short, you know, by and large, in other words

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 15.1003584229 86% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 9.8082437276 92% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.0286738351 136% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2041.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 430.0 407.700716846 105% => OK
Chars per words: 4.74651162791 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55372829156 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73736736617 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 242.0 212.727598566 114% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.562790697674 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 649.8 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 9.59856630824 63% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.94265232975 162% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.2513988108 48.9658058833 107% => OK
Chars per sentence: 92.7727272727 100.406767564 92% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5454545455 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.22727272727 5.45110844103 96% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.5376344086 126% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.352698281593 0.236089414692 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0805725201448 0.076458572812 105% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0875739847288 0.0737576698707 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.215660375628 0.150856017488 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0931517493797 0.0645574589148 144% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 11.7677419355 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.27 10.9000537634 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.01818996416 102% => OK
difficult_words: 97.0 86.8835125448 112% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.