The graph below shows the developing of fitness membership between genders in the past 35 years.-Syerapke- (rewrite)
The graph below shows the developing of fitness membership between genders in the past 30 years.
Overall, the number of men memberships had shown significant fluctuations compared to the women membership.
In 1970, male memberships were as double as the female memberships with numbers of 2000 male members and 1000 female members. Furthermore, both trends constantly fluctuated further. In 1975 men membership rose dramatically to 4000 then fluctuated under 3000 member before reach a peak by 5000 in 1995. In addition, numbers of men membership in year 2000 decreased by tenth comparing with the early measurement. However, women trend fluctuated fewer than 3000 at whole of period. Around 2000 women joined membership in 1975 and dipped to 1800 in 1980 then took a top membership by 2900 in 1985. The journey of women trend then decreased by 2100 and toke twins number by 2900 with the couples years ago. Therefore, it is important to underline that proportion of each gender membership was switch between early and the end of measurement.
- Nowadays it is easy to apply for and be given a credit card. However, some people-experience problems when they are not be able to pay their debts back. In your opinion, do the advantages of credit cards outweigh the advantages?-Syerapke- (rewrite)) 70
- Many people are too scared to leave their home because of a fear of crime Some people think that more should be done to prevent crime whereas others feel that nothing can be done What are your views 62
- The graph below shows the percentage change in the number of international students graduating from universities in different Canadian provinces between 2001 and 2006 (REWRITE). Dedicated to Yora 90
- The diagrams on the right shows two types of building design that help reduce the effects of earthquakes. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.-Syerapke- (rewrite) 65
- The water use in 2000 by six countries in the Middle East. 70
the number of men memberships had shown significant fluctuations
the number of men memberships had been showing significant fluctuations
Sentence: In 1970, male memberships were as double as the female memberships with numbers of 2000 male members and 1000 female members.
Description: The fragment as double as is not usually preceded by were
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace were with was
Sentence: However, women trend fluctuated fewer than 3000 at whole of period.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to women and trend
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
Sentence Length SD: 4.94 7.5
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 170 200
No. of Characters: 856 1000
No. of Different Words: 101 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.611 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.035 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.765 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 57 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 43 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 30 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 28 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.94 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.378 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.522 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.05 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4