Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The opinions of celebrities, such as famous entertainers and athletes, are more important to younger people than they are to older people. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Development of technology has led to an increase in the number of ways through which information is disseminated and opinions are expressed. In this vein, the superpower of the humans of the recent century, the Internet and its ensuing platforms like social media have confronted people with diverse backgrounds to a large number of ideas, mostly widespread by celebrities. Personally speaking, I believe that these ideas are more likely to have an impact on young people rather than older people. This essay will explore a couple of reasons for my perspective in the following paragraphs.
First of all, young people are more affected by the opinions of famous people due to the lack of a solid body of knowledge and experience to set their judgements on. On the other hand, having been subject to various situations, older people are more capable of distinguishing between good and bad opinions. I think a personal example can shed some light on this issue. A couple of years ago, I followed a famous girl on Instagram. Once, she announced that she had decided to gather money to help poor people. As I was completely under her impression, I decided to help her, leaving out the fact that I did not know that girl very well. My father told me that he had been deceived in the same way when he was a young man. The boy, who had told my father that he would have spent that money to help a poor man, just had run away after my father had trusted him. I realized that it could be a fraud and did not help that girl. Afterwards, the police arrested that girl carrying a lot of money that people helped her.
Secondly, since young people have more access to the ideas expressed by celebrities and feel more admiration for their success in their own fields, it is more likely for the celebrities' opinions to have an impact on them. In fact, older people are not really fans of technology. Besides, if they have access to the wide variety of virtual networks, they will prefer to follow politicians or older singers and actors who express more logical and reasonable ideas on their pages. On the contrary, young people prefer to follow celebrities who are young because they are not old-fashioned and have more innovative styles. Thus, young people are more prone to be guided towards confusing or even wrong ways because their mentors could be on wrong tracks, too. Therefore, older people could manage their source of influences better than young people due to the fact that those resources are limited.
On the whole, taking all the aforementioned reasons into account, I believe that young people are more prone to be influenced by celebrities' ideas. Not only do they have less experience to understand the consequences of following celebrities' attitudes, but they also have wider access to famous people's ideas compared to older people.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 225, Rule ID: IT_IS[7]
Message: Did you mean 'it's' (='it is') instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
Suggestion: it's; it is
...of the recent century, the Internet and its ensuing platforms like social media hav...
^^^
Line 1, column 316, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...nted people with diverse backgrounds to a large number of ideas, mostly widespread by celebrities...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 432, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Once” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
... I followed a famous girl on Instagram. Once, she announced that she had decided to ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, if, really, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, well, i think, in fact, first of all, on the contrary, on the whole, in the same way, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 15.1003584229 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 67.0 52.1666666667 128% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2353.0 1977.66487455 119% => OK
No of words: 490.0 407.700716846 120% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80204081633 4.8611393121 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70488508055 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61122748044 2.67179642975 98% => OK
Unique words: 244.0 212.727598566 115% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497959183673 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 742.5 618.680645161 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 50.4512693449 48.9658058833 103% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.954545455 100.406767564 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2727272727 20.6045352989 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.22727272727 5.45110844103 151% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.85842293907 156% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.209482365562 0.236089414692 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0655754687752 0.076458572812 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0480253433233 0.0737576698707 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.142724148003 0.150856017488 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0361325955126 0.0645574589148 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.3 11.7677419355 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.98 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.