Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The author concludes that decline in sea ice levels due to global warming has interrupted the Arctic deer's migration pattern, thereby decreasing their population. While this is plausible at first glance, further examination indicates that is not backed by sufficient evidence to establish that this correlation does in fact indicate causation.
While recent reports may indicate that sea ice has melted as a result of warmer temperatures globally, regional variations are possible. Therefore, it would be important to measure changes in sea ice levels in the Arctic deer's traditional habitat to ascertain whether this has indeed threatened its population. If there hasn't been a significant change in sea ice levels around these islands in Canada's arctic regions, it is possible that other factors may affect the deer's population.
First, it is possible that climate change may have impacted the vegetation on these islands, thereby affecting the availability of food for the animal. This change in vegetation could also be driven by humans introducing new species, whether deliberately or accidentally. If this new species requires significant levels of nutrition from the soil and is hardy enough to out-compete the plants that the deer traditionally feed on, this would negatively impact the native vegetaiton. Further, this new species may not be suitable for consumption by the deer since it may not contain the right balance of nutrients or, worse, it may be harmful. Therefore, apart from sea ice levels, the author should examine whether the region's vegetation has experienced any changes.
Second, local hunters may themselves be responsible for the decline in the species' population. The author does not state whether the hunters follow sustainable and ethical hunting practises and also does not examine if there has been a change in the population of the hunters in the region. For instance, if there has been an increase in the number of hunters, it would follow that a greater number of deer have been killed by the hunters.
Finally, the author needs to provide further evidence regarding the timeline for the change in the deer's population. Has the decline in population coincided with the onset of the global warming? If this predates the latter, even if sea ice in the region has started melting recently, it would not explain why the deer population has been declining.
In conclusion, to assess whether a causal relationship between the metling of sea ice and the decline in the Arctic deer's population exists, it is important to consider additional factors. These include the chronology of these events, the impact of humans on the deer's population levels, and actual changes in sea ice levels and vegetation in the animal's habitat.
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| 2023-07-17 | okazaki11 | 72 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 443 350
No. of Characters: 2273 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.588 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.131 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.724 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 197 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 136 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 81 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 60 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.611 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.193 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.833 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.372 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.621 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.107 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 102, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...obal warming has interrupted the Arctic deers migration pattern, thereby decreasing t...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 321, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: hasn't
...eed threatened its population. If there hasnt been a significant change in sea ice le...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 468, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...sible that other factors may affect the deers population. First, it is possible...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 719, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'regions'' or 'region's'?
Suggestion: regions'; region's
..., the author should examine whether the regions vegetation has experienced any changes....
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 100, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...ding the timeline for the change in the deers population. Has the decline in populati...
^^^^^
Line 21, column 117, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...f sea ice and the decline in the Arctic deers population exists, it is important to c...
^^^^^
Line 21, column 264, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'deers'' or 'deer's'?
Suggestion: deers'; deer's
...ese events, the impact of humans on the deers population levels, and actual changes i...
^^^^^
Line 21, column 348, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'animals'' or 'animal's'?
Suggestion: animals'; animal's
...in sea ice levels and vegetation in the animals habitat.
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, if, may, regarding, second, so, therefore, while, apart from, for instance, in conclusion, in fact, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 11.1786427146 72% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 55.5748502994 95% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 16.3942115768 146% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2339.0 2260.96107784 103% => OK
No of words: 442.0 441.139720559 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.29185520362 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58517132086 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80398444738 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.4592760181 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 733.5 705.55239521 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 34.3025752192 57.8364921388 59% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 129.944444444 119.503703932 109% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.5555555556 23.324526521 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.38888888889 5.70786347227 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.150910769423 0.218282227539 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.051821111691 0.0743258471296 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.04477609167 0.0701772020484 64% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0828787457862 0.128457276422 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0354543043497 0.0628817314937 56% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 14.3799401198 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.66 48.3550499002 80% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.7 12.5979740519 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.33 8.32208582834 112% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 98.500998004 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.