In the hectic modern era, education and success of offsprings have become the paramount issue in parent’s minds and thoughts. They try to employ numerous methods to spur youngsters to study harder. Nowadays, one of the approaches extensively used by parents is offering rewards to children as an incentive for studying harder and achieving better grades. On the other side of the controversy, many parents are opposed to such strategies claiming its long term effects on children is detrimental. I contend that the former method is hugely beneficial, and the vast majority of parents should employ this method. In what follows, two elaborate reasons will vindicate my standpoint.
The first vital point to bear in mind is that the carrot and stick approach stems from a natural law that rules the world. This phenomenon is seen everywhere in the world, such as training your dog to catch the frisbee disk by hugging it every time it obtains the frisbee disk. This event is conspicuous in more sophisticated settings such as modern human struggle with air pollution. In all cases, doing something good results in a reward and doing something inappropriate results in punishment. Youngsters who study hard will receive their prize when they grow up and perhaps seeing the results at age twenty is a little bit too late. Therefore, I believe showing the fruits of their labor sooner might be a perfect approach to motivate them to be more industrious.
My personal experience is a compelling example of this. My sister was not interested in Mathematics when she was in elementary school. Instead, she loved reading novels and spent most of her time reading. My parents decided not to buy her novels unless she gets good grades in her Mathematics. In the beginning, she became indignant, but after a while, my little sister started studying Mathematics tenaciously and excelled in the exams. Had they not taken employed this approach, she would have failed Mathematics.
The second noteworthy reason is that it has scientists have proven that in the learning process of the brain requires both praise and punishment. For instance, when infants touch something hot and feel the pain, they learn to not contact it again in the future. Furthermore, they learn that whenever they cry, parents will reward them by giving them food. Besides, we have all seen many such experiments performed on monkeys too. This fact is the intuition behind many modern Artificial Intelligence methods employed recently by scientists. These methods are present everywhere nowadays, and they are have arguably become the essence of the information era. The backbone of these techniques is the same, giving results to the intelligent agent whenever the agent acts pertinently and punishing otherwise. Experts in this field have mentioned countlessly many times that the learning process of these systems is analogous to the learning process of newborns.
Ultimately, I do believe that providing awards is an effective way of persuading children to become more hardworking primarily because of the carrot and stick argument and secondly because of the cerebral effects of this approach. Albeit some psychological effects have to be taken into consideration, I think the advantages of this method supersedes its disadvantages. Consequently, parents concerned with the educational success of their children should employ this method.
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- TPO-30 - Integrated Writing Task 70
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 617, Rule ID: LITTLE_BIT[1]
Message: Reduce redundancy by using 'little' or 'bit'.
Suggestion: little; bit
...s seeing the results at age twenty is a little bit too late. Therefore, I believe showing ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 602, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'had'.
Suggestion: had
...esent everywhere nowadays, and they are have arguably become the essence of the info...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, but, consequently, first, furthermore, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, while, for instance, i think, such as, in all cases
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 15.1003584229 139% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 65.0 52.1666666667 125% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.0752688172 149% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2873.0 1977.66487455 145% => OK
No of words: 546.0 407.700716846 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.2619047619 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.83390555256 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.85724440977 2.67179642975 107% => OK
Unique words: 294.0 212.727598566 138% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.538461538462 0.524837075471 103% => OK
syllable_count: 875.7 618.680645161 142% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 19.0 9.59856630824 198% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 3.51792114695 28% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 29.0 20.6003584229 141% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.4325317511 48.9658058833 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.0689655172 100.406767564 99% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8275862069 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.68965517241 5.45110844103 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.85842293907 130% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.195557100476 0.236089414692 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0449807554008 0.076458572812 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0337391569981 0.0737576698707 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0996271774421 0.150856017488 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0219991950812 0.0645574589148 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 11.7677419355 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 58.1214874552 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 10.1575268817 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 10.9000537634 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.9 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 151.0 86.8835125448 174% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 10.002688172 115% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.