The mentioned argument about completing a 40 hours of community service for students, prior to graduation, in order to encourage them to attend such charitable work, would be cogent in first glance; however, after reviewing elaborately, we would encounter with some issues.
The first one is that the author, mentioned that in recent years, the number of teenage volunteers has significantly declined. The author has argued the issue, but he has not mentioned how much of these supporters. or volunteers have decreased. He has not offered any statistical reports. What is more he has not clarified that such decrease has happened during how many years. It is not obvious, whether it has happened during a long time or just the past two years. So, mentioned doubt should be more cast on.
What is more he has not considered the reasons of such decrease. There is a possibility that no more volunteers inclined in their work, because there were no demand of helps. There is a possibility that because of governmental helps, there is no necessity of having volunteer for help and as the result, this statistic has decreased. Additionally he has mentioned that young volunteers have decreased, but there is a possibility that because they become older after some years, thay are still helping needy ones, and because of this, there is no reason for youth to do such work, because of the indulgence of their purpose, which is a charitable work. He also has forgotten some details. It is probable that such decrease has happened exactly during the exam seasons. Therefore, concluding the decrease of such group would not be compelling.
Moreover, he mentioned that teachers and parents agree with the importance of such notion, that teenagers work through charitable work, but it does not mean that they have accepted to make a such restricted policy of passing 40 hours of such service. Studying for students, parents and their teachers is the first priority, therefore, it is probable that lots of complains through such policy arise, after observing student's unsatisfying grades, because of interference to their work.
To wrap up, the bleak picture of assumption argued by the author should be more painted on, since he could not offer a well analyzed and cogent argument.
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Sentence: Additionally he has mentioned that young volunteers have decreased, but there is a possibility that because they become older after some years, thay are still helping needy ones, and because of this, there is no reason for youth to do such work, because of the indulgence of their purpose, which is a charitable work.
Error: thay Suggestion: they
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 376 350
No. of Characters: 1843 1500
No. of Different Words: 178 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.403 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.902 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.657 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.118 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 13.433 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.354 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.574 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.247 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5