27 The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper.
"Commuters complain that increased rush-hour traffic on Blue Highway between the suburbs and the city center has doubled their commuting time. The favored proposal of the motorists' lobby is to widen the highway, adding an additional lane of traffic. But last year's addition of a lane to the nearby Green Highway was followed by a worsening of traffic jams on it. A better alternative is to add a bicycle lane to Blue Highway. Many area residents are keen bicyclists. A bicycle lane would encourage them to use bicycles to commute, and so would reduce rush-hour traffic rather than fostering an increase."
The author of this letter asserts that the additional bicycle lane to Blue Highway would reduce rush-hour traffic for the reasons that additional motor lane in Green Highway worsen the traffic condition rather than improve it, as well as the residents are keen bicyclists. Although the argument seems plausible at the first glance, a close scrutiny reveals its untenability.
At the first place, the traffic condition of Green Highway is not comparable to Blue Highway. The more severe traffic jams of Green Highway may be caused by many reasons. Perhaps the increasing speed of motors has already exceeded the improvement of Green Highway so that only one additional lane is not enough. Or perhaps other ways to the destination are under construction, thus more motorists have to drive along Green Highway. Therefore, the author cannot attribute the increasing rush-hour traffic to the additional motor lane.
Secondly, the author mistakenly equals many keen bicyclists to many people who would use bicycles to commute. On the one hand, whether those bicyclists are willing to ride to work is unknown. Although many residents are keen bicyclists, they may be more likely to ride on weekend. Or perhaps these residents do not need to commute through Blue Highway. On the other hand, it may be unrelistic for residents to ride to work. The Blue Highway are between suburbs and the city center, which may be too long to ride. If few residents would like ride along Blue Highway, the additional bicycle lane is useless.
Thirdly, suppose many residents are likely to use bicycles to commute, it is uncertain whether riding bicycles would save time. If riding to work spends much more time than driving, more residents would choose to commute by motor though there may be traffic jam. Furthermore, if riding a bicycle spends less time than driving in rush-hour and thus more residents would ride to work, the rash-hour traffic would reduce, which in turn would attract more riders to drive to work again. Thus, the additional bicycle lane cannot guarantee a better traffic condition.
Finally, the author bases the argument on the assumption that the number of motor would be constant during the next few years, which may be wrong. Even though the bicycle lane would reduce the traffic rush-hour in some degree, increasing number of motors would cause more severe traffic jams without additional motor lanes.
In conclusion, the author does not prove that additional bicycle lane would smooth the traffic pressure, at lease bases on this letter. To make argument more persuasive, the author should provide more information about the number of motors in Blue Highway and the distance between suburbs and city center. More statistics, such as whether residents would ride to work are also appreciated.
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2, argument 3 and argument 4 could be put in one argument.
read a good sample:
http://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-argument-task-essays/commuters-complain-…
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 457 350
No. of Characters: 2286 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.624 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.002 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.419 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 173 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 127 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.87 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.98 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.826 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.364 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.575 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.131 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5