Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The writer argues in the passage that the population of arctic deer is decreasing with the global warming phenomenon. It is explained by the incapability of crossing the frozen sea to move to another separated island. However, in order to evaluate the argument, more evidence regarding environmental change is required.
Firstly, the number of animals that also feed the plants competing with the deer might have increased. It is unsound that the plants that the deer feed are only fed by the deer; other species might also eat them. If the populations of other animals such as rabbits and squirrels increased, the total amount of plants available to the deer might be reduced. As a result, due to the lack of grass, the deer population might be declined. In this case, the decline of the deer population cannot blame global warming.
Secondly, the decreased deer populations might be related to the over-haunting by local hunters. There might be a new trend of wearing clothes made of deer leather with research about how efficiently the leather helps to endure the extreme cold. It might more people to demand the deer leather, thus, the number of haunted deer might be increased. If then, the writer’s assertion cannot hold water.
Thirdly, there is no evidence of how many portions of ice were melt due to global warming. Although the average temperature has increased, the amount of ice might be not that different. In order to claim the global warming prevented the deer from crossing the sea to move to another island, the ice had to be melted as much as the deer cannot cross it. Without mentioning how much the ice melted, it is difficult to consider the claim is true.
To sum up, the assertion, as it stands
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| 2023-07-17 | okazaki11 | 72 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 296 350
No. of Characters: 1385 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.148 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.679 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.498 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 99 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 71 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.412 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.03 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.588 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.35 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.35 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 59, Rule ID: WERE_VBB[1]
Message: Did you mean 'where' or 'we'?
Suggestion: where; we
...no evidence of how many portions of ice were melt due to global warming. Although th...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, however, if, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, third, thirdly, thus, such as, as a result, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.6327345309 81% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 1.0 11.1786427146 9% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 5.0 13.6137724551 37% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 13.0 28.8173652695 45% => OK
Preposition: 44.0 55.5748502994 79% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1430.0 2260.96107784 63% => OK
No of words: 296.0 441.139720559 67% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.83108108108 5.12650576532 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.14784890444 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.60667015044 2.78398813304 94% => OK
Unique words: 145.0 204.123752495 71% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.489864864865 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 439.2 705.55239521 62% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 31.006640655 57.8364921388 54% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 84.1176470588 119.503703932 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.4117647059 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.47058823529 5.70786347227 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.140285193596 0.218282227539 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0473456707061 0.0743258471296 64% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0425177065684 0.0701772020484 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0746446000031 0.128457276422 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0454030364194 0.0628817314937 72% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 14.3799401198 70% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 12.197005988 71% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.44 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.21 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.