Evidence suggests that academic honor codes, which call for students to agree not to cheat in their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect that others have cheated, are far more successful than are other methods at deterring che

Essay topics:

Evidence suggests that academic honor codes, which call for students to agree not to cheat in their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect that others have cheated, are far more successful than are other methods at deterring cheating among students at colleges and universities. Several years ago, Groveton College adopted such a code and discontinued its old-fashioned system in which teachers closely monitored students. Under the old system, teachers reported an average of thirty cases of cheating per year. In the first year the honor code was in place, students reported twenty-one cases of cheating; five years later, this figure had dropped to fourteen. Moreover, in a recent survey, a majority of Groveton students said that they would be less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without.

Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.

The originator of the argument asserts that academic honor codes are far more effective at preventing students from cheating then other methods of control. This conclusion is buttressed by several evidences; however, may these facts have alternative explanations? To answer on this question we need to closerly look at these evidences.

The main evidence which is used to support the conclusion is that the average of cases of cheating reported per year has dropped drastically since the honor code was implemented in the Groveton College (GC). The author of the text surmises that only one possible explanation of the alteration of the average exists - it is extermely efficient way to control students' conduct. However, may this turn be explained otherwise? The answer is loud "yes". For instance, teachers used to have a duty to closely monitor their student; that means that the educators had to pay attention to this activity. Today students should report about cases of cheating but their major task is to study and to acquire knowledge. Consequently, students' control may be poor in contrast with teachers' one.

Furthermore, the writer of the argument tends to equal the number of cases of cheating committed with the number of cases of fraud reported. Probably, these two numbers are not equal to each other. Students may cheat more or less then before but the closeness of the number of the cases reported and perpetrated is profoundly connected with effictiveness of monitoring. Then better control we have, then more these two numbers will be related to each other. Owing to the fact that we were not told about these data we cannot and should not accept the author's belief that honor code is better than the old and traditional system.

Finally, the arguement claims that the academic honor codes are more successful than are other ways to monitor students. At the same time, the conclusion is based on one case of GC. Perhaps it is not reasonable to extrapolate one case on the whole situation. The Groveton College may be an unique and exeptional case because of its inherent characteristics such as century old traditions etc. Moreover, our analysis has displayed that author's explanation of the data of the fulfillment of the policy is questionable and needs to be reenforced by additional information.

In conclusion, the author's belief that honor code is more effective as a method of preventing cases of cheating is not buttressed properly and given evidences may be explained by factors which were not taking into account by the originator; therefore his or her conclusion is not warranted.

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Comments

Sentence: To answer on this question we need to closerly look at these evidences.
Error: closerly Suggestion: closely

Sentence: The author of the text surmises that only one possible explanation of the alteration of the average exists - it is extermely efficient way to control students' conduct.
Error: extermely Suggestion: extremely

Sentence: Students may cheat more or less then before but the closeness of the number of the cases reported and perpetrated is profoundly connected with effictiveness of monitoring.
Error: effictiveness Suggestion: effectiveness

Sentence: Finally, the arguement claims that the academic honor codes are more successful than are other ways to monitor students.
Error: arguement Suggestion: argument

Sentence: The Groveton College may be an unique and exeptional case because of its inherent characteristics such as century old traditions etc. Moreover, our analysis has displayed that author's explanation of the data of the fulfillment of the policy is questionable and needs to be reenforced by additional information.
Error: exeptional Suggestion: exceptional
Error: reenforced Suggestion: No alternate word

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argument 1 -- not OK

argument 2 -- OK

argument 3 -- not exactly
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flaws:
When the essay topic is something like: 'discuss one or more alternative explanations...', it means there are no flaws in the topic which is different to traditional GRE essays.

read a sample:
http://www.testbig.com/gmatgre-essays/evidence-suggests-academic-honor-…

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 430 350
No. of Characters: 2140 1500
No. of Different Words: 209 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.554 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.977 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.741 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 149 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 125 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 57 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.881 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.29 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.497 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.074 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5

Hello. I am sorry. I have just reread my essay and the recommended one. I understand that the second work is written better but at the same time my essay seems to have its merits (explanations differs from the example essay; however, they still explain and accept the given evidences.
The first explanation is that the improvement in average is caused by the fact that for students the reporting of cases of cheating as well as monitoring of them is a background activity; for teachers it was one of the professional activities.
I want to underscore, that I do not doubt In given data but explain the result via possible explanation. I do not try to argue against it.
the second is number of cheating committed does not equal the number of cheating reported. (we both agree with it.)
the third is incorrect due to the fact that I should give an alternative explanations rather then critique it.
Thank your for your time, I indeed try to understand the argument essay.

P.s. what type of instructions have hidden secrets, for instance, alternative explanations means that the argument is correct.
Thank you.

The reasons is that we didn't understand exactly what did you mean in the first argument:

'the educators had to pay attention to this activity. Today students should report about cases of cheating but their major task is to study and to acquire knowledge. Consequently, students' control may be poor in contrast with teachers' one.'

You didn't express your ideas clearly.