Nowadays, many people like to keep records of their lives with pictures to social-networking sites. However, I do not like creating such records that can be seen by other people. I would like to explain why I dislike it with reasons and examples below.
First, Activities in social-networking sites can be changed to showing off themselves to people who are connected in online society from the original purpose of recording their lives. Most SNS records are usually full of good points of life and hardly seen bad sides of their lives. If one of the uploaded contents has good reactions from people, we feel happiness and self-satisfaction from those people’s attention. Which makes people addicted to uploading attractive pictures or opinions for successful reactions on SNS. For example, I can see many Chinese women in Shanghai Koreatown who are well dressed and only focused on taking pictures of many different poses in famous spots, not enjoying the real Koreatown. They just need pictures for uploading on the Instrgram.
Second, the SNS activities need lots of energy and time spending. It is a really time and energy consuming job when we read and add our comments to people’s reactions on our pictures and information. In addition, the content that we upload causes a trouble sometimes, if it includes some secrets or criticisms to other people. We can also be heart-broken by negative comments which I cannot accept. For instance, one famous Korean singer made a suicide a few years ago, due to serious SNS debates and aggressive negative messages on her opinion uploaded. This case gave Korean society a big shock, and people criticized the SNS activity as helpless to our lives.
To sum up, even though SNS activity that is uploading opinions and pictures on sites has several merits such as recording and socializing, it has also many side effects like exaggerating their lives, time consuming, and cyber terror and so on. In this regard, I prefer not to create such records.
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- TOEFL integrated Question the extinction of Steller s sea cow 87
- Which one of the following values is the most important to share with a young child(5-10 years old)? 1.being helpful2.Being honest3.Being well organized 60
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 649, Rule ID: NUMEROUS_DIFFERENT[1]
Message: Use simply 'many'.
Suggestion: many
... and only focused on taking pictures of many different poses in famous spots, not enjoying the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 73, Rule ID: A_RB_NN[1]
Message: You used an adverb ('really') instead an adjective, or a noun ('time') instead of another adjective.
...lots of energy and time spending. It is a really time and energy consuming job when we read a...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, really, second, so, well, for example, for instance, in addition, such as, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 15.1003584229 53% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 11.0286738351 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 30.0 43.0788530466 70% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 52.1666666667 90% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.0752688172 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1676.0 1977.66487455 85% => OK
No of words: 332.0 407.700716846 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.04819277108 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.2685907696 4.48103885553 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8369336917 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 188.0 212.727598566 88% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.566265060241 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 520.2 618.680645161 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 9.59856630824 104% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 51.8110087031 48.9658058833 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.5882352941 100.406767564 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.5294117647 20.6045352989 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.47058823529 5.45110844103 119% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.312557299305 0.236089414692 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0989557063514 0.076458572812 129% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0799728646759 0.0737576698707 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.207204135032 0.150856017488 137% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.109248732331 0.0645574589148 169% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 58.1214874552 90% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 10.9000537634 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.91 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 91.0 86.8835125448 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.