The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station
“Over the past year, our late night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this time period, most of the complaints received from viewers were concerned with our station’s coverage of weather and local news. In addition, local businesses that used to advertise during our late night news program have just canceled their advertising contracts with us. Therefore, in order to attract more viewers to the program and to avoid losing any further advertising revenues, we should restore the devoted to weather and local news to former level.”
The assumption that to attract more viewers to the program and aviod losing further adverstising revenue, would be restored by bringing back weather and local news to its formal level might seem true at first glance. The author assertion about restoring the weather and local news to its former level would be true if the author's conclusion is not only based on the underlying assumptions but provides more conclusive assumptions.
Firstly, the author asumes that the local businesses cancelled their advertising contracts due to the removal of the weather and local news. What if they deceided to cancel it because they got other cheaper alternatives and that television station charges a fee they feel seems high compare to others. The author didn't provide a solid reason to why they left but just assumed they left because of the weather and local news that the television staion stopped. The author didn't consider other options that could lead to them swtiching to other television stations.
Additionally, what if their competitors has introduced other perks that had lured these local businesses to move to their television stations. Or what if they decided to stop operating not because of the weather and local news that were stopped but because they are not generating sufficient revenue from the advertsisement- the adverstisement is not providing enough traction to them and they don't see the benefit of them continuing with these advertisement.
The local businesses could have decided to adopt social media as a better way of adverstising instead of using television stations. Given the recent change by people to use social media and spend ample time there. Nowadays, social media is the new normal and most people spend their time on social media. The local business could have noticed this change and decided to transistion to using it instead of television stations.
The author's conslusion could have been more solid if there were other conclusive evidence that depicts the movement of the local businesses and not just stating that they moved as a result of the local news and weather forecast that was ended. Other reasons could have caused them to move and not necessaarily the afforementioned by the author.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 16 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 367 350
No. of Characters: 1845 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.377 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.027 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.648 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 123 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.214 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.765 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.391 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.662 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.187 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 323, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...o its former level would be true if the authors conclusion is not only based on the und...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 314, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...eems high compare to others. The author didnt provide a solid reason to why they left...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 472, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: didn't
...e television staion stopped. The author didnt consider other options that could lead ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 395, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...viding enough traction to them and they dont see the benefit of them continuing with...
^^^^
Line 5, column 440, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this advertisement' or 'these advertisements'?
Suggestion: this advertisement; these advertisements
...see the benefit of them continuing with these advertisement. The local businesses could have dec...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, if, so, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 34.0 28.8173652695 118% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 55.5748502994 67% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1880.0 2260.96107784 83% => OK
No of words: 364.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.16483516484 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36792674256 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68857669266 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478021978022 0.468620217663 102% => OK
syllable_count: 576.9 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.519100162 57.8364921388 112% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.285714286 119.503703932 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0 23.324526521 111% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.85714285714 5.70786347227 50% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.20313578493 0.218282227539 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0770615668974 0.0743258471296 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0404262895875 0.0701772020484 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.108512667428 0.128457276422 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0157894736311 0.0628817314937 25% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.9 14.3799401198 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.94 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.74 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.