The graph below shows the number of complaints made about noise to Environmental Health authorities in the city of Newton between 1980 and 1996.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Given is a visual providing an overview concerning about the number of complaints made about noise to Environmental Health authorities in the city of Newton between 1980 and 1996. According to the visuals it is readily apparent that the line domestic/household increased dramatically after some period of stability whereas the line (road works) suffered from constant decline and expressed its downward trend reaching to 1996.
From the first glance at the visuals it turns out to be that both line domestic/household and the line traffic noise started the year with stability till 1984 following that they began to increase from 1988 to 1996 ( number of complaints: domestic household: it was 500 complaints and in 1996 it was 1200 the line traffic noise: in 1980 it was 300, in 1996 it was 600).
One particular interesting fact highlighted by the visual is that the line factories rised gradually prior to 1986 and continued with period of stability combined with some fluctuations ( in 1980 it was 400 and in 1996 it was 700 complaints respectively).
Overall to conclude this chart one can infer from the diagram that the line domestic/household is twice as much as than the line traffic noise moving on to the end of the years ( 1200 complaints and 600 complaints in 1996 respectively).
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Sentence: One particular interesting fact highlighted by the visual is that the line factories rised gradually prior to 1986 and continued with period of stability combined with some fluctuations in 1980 it was 400 and in 1996 it was 700 complaints respectively.
Error: rised Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Don't need those numbers, like:
number of complaints: domestic household: it was 500 complaints and in 1996 it was 1200 the line traffic noise: in 1980 it was 300, in 1996 it was 600
Instead, need to make more comparisons where relevant. for example, you said:
'started the year with stability till 1984 following that they began to increase from 1988 to 1996'
but how are the years from 1984 to 1988? why you ignored them?
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
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No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
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Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.596 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.886 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.211 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4