At first glance, it may seem logical to agree with the author's argument that the Madagascan shrimp will quickly become an endangered species due to deep-sea fishing in their habitat. The evidence presented is the population has been reduced significantly by recent incursions by the fisherman and breeding season will not repopulate the population back to levels seen before the boats arrived. There are many flaws with this argument; therefore, I will discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would strengthen or weaken the argument.
Firstly, the prompt suggests that the recent incursions have led to a significant reduction of these shrimp within their habitat. Although this may hold merit, more specific evidence such as a percentage of shrimp lost is needed to strengthen the argument. If the author gave us what percent of the population remained after the incursions, we could then determine how much the shrimp needs to reproduce during breeding season to return the levels back to normal.
Secondly, the passage doesn't tell us how much the population will increase during breeding season. We don't know whether the shrimp reproduce by the masses or not. Specific evidence of how well shrimp can repopulate their habitat would strengthen the argument. We cannot say with confidence that the population will not return to the levels before the fishing boats arrived without that information.
Thirdly, more specific evidence is needed strengthen the argument that if this trend continues over the next several years, it will quickly lead to the endangerment of the shrimp. Without this information, we cannot determine the speed in which we will see the population diminish. For all we know, the shrimp may not become endangered within the next few centuries or if it will become endangered at all.
In summary, the argument contains many holes and needs more specific proof to strengthen the argument. If the author can provide more specific examples as to how much the shrimp reduces after each incursion, how much the population will increase during breeding season, and provide a specific time frame in which the population will become endangered will make the argument incredibly strong.
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e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 364 350
No. of Characters: 1861 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.368 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.113 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.592 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 107 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 81 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.267 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.022 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.733 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.401 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.601 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 56, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
..., it may seem logical to agree with the authors argument that the Madagascan shrimp wil...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 23, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ack to normal. Secondly, the passage doesnt tell us how much the population will in...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 103, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ill increase during breeding season. We dont know whether the shrimp reproduce by th...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, third, thirdly, well, as to, in summary, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 19.6327345309 31% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 21.0 12.9520958084 162% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 55.5748502994 76% => OK
Nominalization: 29.0 16.3942115768 177% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1905.0 2260.96107784 84% => OK
No of words: 362.0 441.139720559 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26243093923 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64979915246 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 164.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.453038674033 0.468620217663 97% => OK
syllable_count: 581.4 705.55239521 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 57.5203925191 57.8364921388 99% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.0 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.1333333333 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.46666666667 5.70786347227 131% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.214103081037 0.218282227539 98% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0889374708701 0.0743258471296 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0729234950027 0.0701772020484 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.143218678674 0.128457276422 111% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0649932614824 0.0628817314937 103% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 14.3799401198 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.52 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.79 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 98.500998004 69% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.