The following appeared as part of a business plan developed by the manager of the Rialto MovieTheater."Despite its downtown location, the Rialto Movie Theater, a local institution for five decades, must make big changes or close its doors forever. It shou

In a business plan prepared by the manager of the Rialto movie theater he has concluded that hamper its share of a decreasing moviegoers, it must replicate the Apex movie theater located outside of the town. In order to conclude that he has presented few facts about Apex theater and a report of a survey concluding that the movie ticket prices are increasing. But manager has forgotten to analyse the whole thing, so it would be perfunctory to conclude without analyse those facts.

Manager has illustrated that the Apex theater is located in a mall and it is out of the town. And he has assumed that the number of movie goers are increased there. It is apparent that the Rialto movie theater is no longer most visited theater.
But he has given no reason behind why the number of customers is decreasing. He has stated that the theater is there since last five decades . since when this change of visitor is noted. May be the number of theaters in town is increased, or may be no interesting or watchable movie is in the market right now and this decrease is documented in during that period.

He has said that the Apex theater is at located out side the town in the mall. But there is no report asserting that the number of movie goers is increased there. Further he has added that Apex theater has features like video arcade , carpeting seats and a state of the art sound system but there is no proof weather this amenities are success or not. He has given a survey report that 85 percent of the respondents have reported that the high price of the newly released movies have restricted them from going to the movie for more than five times per year. But who were the respondents ? How many movie goers were surveyed ?
do the survey contained everyone of them ? May be the Apex theater has increased its price to commensurate the cost of amenities they are providing and the respondents used to go there. And survey contains which regions ? Was the survey endemic to that particular town only or universal ? The manage has said that replicating the Apex theater would be helpful.
But do the both theater having same circumstances ? What if the Rialto theater needs something else .

So, in order to decide weather the Rialto theater needs the change Or not the manager need some more explainations about the reason behind the decrements in visitors of the theater, authentic report about the success of Apex theater. further if the manager found the need of change than making the theater available with the amenities like that Apex theater have would be useful or not ?

Votes
Average: 4.3 (3 votes)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 442, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... whole thing, so it would be perfunctory to conclude without analyse those facts....
^^
Line 4, column 141, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...theater is there since last five decades . since when this change of visitor is no...
^^
Line 4, column 144, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Since
...ater is there since last five decades . since when this change of visitor is noted. M...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 144, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ater is there since last five decades . since when this change of visitor is noted. M...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 192, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...en this change of visitor is noted. May be the number of theaters in town is incre...
^^
Line 4, column 328, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...n the market right now and this decrease is documented in during that period. ...
^^
Line 6, column 50, Rule ID: OUT_SIDE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'outside'?
Suggestion: outside
...aid that the Apex theater is at located out side the town in the mall. But there is no r...
^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 234, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...x theater has features like video arcade , carpeting seats and a state of the art ...
^^
Line 6, column 319, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...nd system but there is no proof weather this amenities are success or not. He has g...
^^^^
Line 6, column 348, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...of weather this amenities are success or not. He has given a survey report that 8...
^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Do
...? How many movie goers were surveyed ? do the survey contained everyone of them ?...
^^
Line 7, column 47, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[8]
Message: The proper name in singular (May) must be used with a third-person verb: 'is'.
Suggestion: is
...survey contained everyone of them ? May be the Apex theater has increased its pric...
^^
Line 7, column 290, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
...hat particular town only or universal ? The manage has said that replicating the Apex thea...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 99, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... the Rialto theater needs something else . So, in order to decide weather ...
^^
Line 12, column 23, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ing else . So, in order to decide weather the Rialto theater needs the cha...
^^
Line 12, column 236, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Further
...port about the success of Apex theater. further if the manager found the need of change...
^^^^^^^

Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'then', 'as for']

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.272727272727 0.25644967241 106% => OK
Verbs: 0.196280991736 0.15541462614 126% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0371900826446 0.0836205057962 44% => Some adjectives wanted.
Adverbs: 0.0330578512397 0.0520304965353 64% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0351239669421 0.0272364105082 129% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.134297520661 0.125424944231 107% => OK
Participles: 0.0681818181818 0.0416121511921 164% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.46287929783 2.79052419416 88% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0165289256198 0.026700313972 62% => OK
Particles: 0.00206611570248 0.001811407834 114% => OK
Determiners: 0.134297520661 0.113004496875 119% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0103305785124 0.0255425247493 40% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0123966942149 0.0127820249294 97% => OK

Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2594.0 2731.13054187 95% => OK
No of words: 463.0 446.07635468 104% => OK
Chars per words: 5.60259179266 6.12365571057 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63868890866 4.57801047555 101% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.31101511879 0.378187486979 82% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.213822894168 0.287650121315 74% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.125269978402 0.208842608468 60% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0863930885529 0.135150697306 64% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46287929783 2.79052419416 88% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 207.018472906 94% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.421166306695 0.469332199767 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 46.5662821661 52.1807786196 89% => OK
How many sentences: 25.0 20.039408867 125% => OK
Sentence length: 18.52 23.2022227129 80% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.0596298711 57.7814097925 106% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.76 141.986410481 73% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.52 23.2022227129 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.24 0.724660767414 33% => More Discourse Markers wanted.
Paragraphs: 7.0 5.14285714286 136% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 3.58251231527 447% => Correct essay format wanted or double check grammar & spelling issues after essay writing.
Readability: 39.9022894168 51.9672348444 77% => OK
Elegance: 1.796875 1.8405768891 98% => OK

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.40950067437 0.441005458295 93% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.137519777076 0.135418324435 102% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0758539310258 0.0829849096947 91% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.585318660751 0.58762219726 100% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.175308089775 0.147661913831 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.171924220235 0.193483328276 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101981567303 0.0970749176394 105% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.443225957784 0.42659136922 104% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.100820870839 0.0774707102158 130% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.280629529441 0.312017818177 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0654283169715 0.0698173142475 94% => OK

Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.33743842365 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.87684729064 58% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 12.0 4.82512315271 249% => Less neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 9.0 6.46551724138 139% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 6.0 2.82389162562 212% => OK
Total topic words: 18.0 14.657635468 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

---------------------
More arguments wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
---------------------
Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.