21.09.2017 In some countries the average weight and fitness are decreasing.
What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?
A number of those who have issues with excessive weight and overall fitness keep growing steadily in many states. Below some reasons of the trend as well as possible solutions will be discussed in details.
On the one hand, the problems mentioned above are apparently caused by several reasons. Firstly, adhering to unhealthy food habits is one of them. For instance, regular consuming of fast and convenience food, eating in the late evening or in the middle of the night are examples of a conduct that causes excessive weight and leads to poor state of health. Furthermore, insufficient or even absenting exercise stress is another troublemaker. In many countries, in particular in those with high GDP per capita, citizens avoid walking and instead prefer using private vehicles. Those are two major factors that contribute greatly to the development of the trend in discussion.
On the other hand, some actions may be taken to fight the tendency back. Primarily, editing prohibitory laws may help enormously. For instance, a possibility exists to pass novel laws that will force fast food chains to serve only healthy, organic food. Furthermore, usage of automobiles in megalopolises and urban areas could be restricted as well. For instance, closing parking lots in the downtown, near malls and prohibition of driving in some parts of cities and towns would coerce folk to walk more. Additionally, rising public’s awareness about the causes of the problems as well as promotion of ways to overcome them could have an advantageous influence on the individuals’ habitual behavior. To exemplify, explaining how walking short distances regularly may improve overall health condition could encourage drivers to give up their cars, moreover, showing parents how greasy food undermines well-being of their offspring could motivate mothers and fathers pay more attention to a healthy diet of their progeny. Those are some measures that may help to combat the harmful trend.
To sum up, unfitness and overweight of many in some countries has become a real problem that is caused by unhealthy habits that may be remodeled through system of prohibitions and encouragements.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Additionally, rising public’s awareness about the causes of the problems as well as promotion of ways to overcome them could have an advantageous influence on the individuals’ habitual behavior.
Description: 'them' refers to what? Be sensitive to use pronouns. and before and after 'as well as' is not parallel. can you re-write this sentence?
unfitness and overweight of many in some countries has become
unfitness and overweight of many in some countries have become
a real problem that is caused by unhealthy habits that may be remodeled through system of prohibitions and encouragements.
Description: better not to use two 'that' in one sentence
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flaws:
a lot of 'for instance':
For instance, regular consuming of fast and convenience food, eating in the late evening or in the middle of the night are examples
For instance, a possibility exists to pass novel laws that will force fast food chains to serve only healthy, organic food.
For instance, closing parking lots in the downtown,
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 346 350
No. of Characters: 1781 1500
No. of Different Words: 208 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.313 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.147 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.746 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 135 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 108 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 71 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.353 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.477 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.882 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.466 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.061 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Don't repeat something in one
Yes, it is right on the topic. but Don't repeat something in one essay. look:
a lot of 'for instance':
For instance, regular consuming of fast and convenience food, eating in the late evening or in the middle of the night are examples
For instance, a possibility exists to pass novel laws that will force fast food chains to serve only healthy, organic food.
For instance, closing parking lots in the downtown,
Transition Words or Phrases used:
apparently, but, first, firstly, furthermore, if, may, moreover, so, well, for instance, in particular, as well as, to sum up, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 15.0 24.0651302605 62% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 41.998997996 133% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.3376753507 120% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1842.0 1615.20841683 114% => OK
No of words: 346.0 315.596192385 110% => OK
Chars per words: 5.32369942197 5.12529762239 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.31289638616 4.20363070211 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91807342739 2.80592935109 104% => OK
Unique words: 214.0 176.041082164 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.618497109827 0.561755894193 110% => OK
syllable_count: 571.5 506.74238477 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 5.43587174349 37% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 16.0721442886 106% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.2975951904 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 67.8093194644 49.4020404114 137% => OK
Chars per sentence: 108.352941176 106.682146367 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.3529411765 20.7667163134 98% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.47058823529 7.06120827912 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.01903807615 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.67935871743 104% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.162298524826 0.244688304435 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0482033474958 0.084324248473 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0391579210398 0.0667982634062 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0987827571494 0.151304729494 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0274659953463 0.056905535591 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.8 13.0946893788 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 50.2224549098 85% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.58 12.4159519038 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.69 8.58950901804 113% => OK
difficult_words: 111.0 78.4519038076 141% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 9.78957915832 77% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.1190380762 99% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.