TPO3-writing integrated

One of Rembrandt's famous paintings about a woman's portrait is a controversial issue as to whether it was made by Rembrandt himself or not. The author points out three major doubts on that the portrait of a woman is Rembrandt's work, on the other hand the lecturer proves the painting is indeed Rembrandt's piece of work by using reexamination result to explain.

In the reading passage, the first reasonable doubt is the inconsistent of the woman's dress. The woman wears a cap which is a usual servant wear, in the meanwhile she also puts on a coat which has a luxurious fur collar. Due to the fact that Rembrandt is well-known for his attention to the details, this contradict is unlikely to happen. Moreover, Rembrandt is also famous for mastering the light and shadow of the paintings. In this case, the dark fur collar makes the painting's brightness unreasonable which is another error Rembrandt would never made. The third doubt is that through the examination, the artwork was proved being painted on a panel which was composed by several pieces of wood, and none of his work is ever like this way.

The speaker begins by saying that all the above doubts on the painting are true, but it is absolutely a Rembrandt's work Because after analyzing the pigment of the painting, it reveals that the fur collar is not the part of the original painting, in other words it was added long after the painting was completed. This discovery solves the doubts of the conflicting between the servant cap and luxurious fur collar, and the unbalanced brightness of the woman's face, so does why the painting was made on a panel consisted of different pieces of wood.

Votes
Average: 6.8 (3 votes)
Essay Categories

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 85, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...omans portrait is a controversial issue as to whether it was made by Rembrandt himself or not...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 471, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'paintings'' or 'painting's'?
Suggestion: paintings'; painting's
...his case, the dark fur collar makes the paintings brightness unreasonable which is anothe...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, moreover, so, third, well, while, as to, in other words, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 10.4613686534 201% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 5.04856512141 20% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 12.0772626932 75% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 22.412803532 76% => OK
Preposition: 40.0 30.3222958057 132% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 5.01324503311 80% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1371.0 1373.03311258 100% => OK
No of words: 288.0 270.72406181 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.76041666667 5.08290768461 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11953428781 4.04702891845 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65649962516 2.5805825403 103% => OK
Unique words: 148.0 145.348785872 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.513888888889 0.540411800872 95% => OK
syllable_count: 404.1 419.366225166 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.55342163355 90% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 3.25607064018 92% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.23620309051 85% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.25165562914 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 1.51434878587 198% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 2.5761589404 194% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 13.0662251656 77% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 21.2450331126 132% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 68.8279739641 49.2860985944 140% => OK
Chars per sentence: 137.1 110.228320801 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.8 21.698381199 133% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.6 7.06452816374 136% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 2.0 4.19205298013 48% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 2.0 4.33554083885 46% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0 0.272083759551 0% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0 0.0996497079465 0% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0662205650399 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0 0.162205337803 0% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0443174109184 0% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.4 13.3589403974 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.98 53.8541721854 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 5.55761589404 158% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.8 11.0289183223 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.92 12.2367328918 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.04 8.42419426049 95% => OK
difficult_words: 55.0 63.6247240618 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 10.7273730684 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.498013245 126% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.2008830022 125% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:

para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).

Don't need a conclusion paragraph.

Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster

It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.

Rates: 3.33333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 1.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.