MUSIC or SCHOOL as Future Career

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MUSIC or SCHOOL as Future Career

In today’s world, future career is the most concern thing on most several people. As usual, many parents will start to think about future for their children. Some parents still have a good plan for their children, but the other parents will give all of decision to their children. There are many plans for the best future. Some people believe that a high degree school can make their children have a bright future. On the other hand, the other believes that an art career can make their future more shine than just a high degree school.

There are many kinds of art career, such as musician. Music is the most intimate thing in our life. Everybody must be like to listening music. Therefore, some people think that they can get bright future if they choose music as their future career site. Because it seems from many singers or musician have a great future. They are Michael Jackson and Justin Bieber. They have everything which want for the other.

On the contrary, education is the most important thing of life. Also, education is the primary needed for most people. Consequently, the parents will do everything to enroll school for their children. They believe that their children can get a bright future if they have a high degree of education. At the same time, their children will get a diploma with the high prestige in their future. A diploma can use to find a good job for their future career.

So, comparison from both of two sides, is being a musician, it is about a talent. And beside that education is about knowledge. According to me, If we have a talent, we just choose a music as our career. We must have a great idea in each of our music composition. Because people will choose a great musician as their favorite, the other can be eliminate and desperate. Whereas, not of all people can be a smart student. They are who is in bottom of educational level, not have a great future in their school. Thus, they can choose another career for their future.

To summarize, future career is all about us. Even though there are many kinds of career, it just depending on ourselves to do that. However, we decided need an education. Because education is not only about studying, but also about life and social.

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2014-01-02 Dera 70 view
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Sentence: However, we decided need an education.
Description: A verb, past tense is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to decided and need

flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.742 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.508 7.5
No. of Different Words: 161 200

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 31 15
No. of Words: 395 350
No. of Characters: 1767 1500
No. of Different Words: 161 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.458 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.473 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.162 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 117 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 64 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 12.742 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.508 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.452 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.459 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.137 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5