Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the purported decline in deer populations is the result of the deer's being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In this argument, the author concluded that the decline in the deer populations is a result of them being unable to follow their normal migration patterns. This statement is based on limited evidence and assumptions made by the author. In order to better support the claim made here the author must provide more specific evidence.
To begin, the author makes the assumption that reports given by local hunters are accurate. It is possible that the local hunters the author mentions are incorrect about the decline of the deer. To provide a stronger argument the author should include the number of hunters who report the decline. They should also seek more accurate data on the deer populations of Canada’s arctic regions. If they find that there truly is more data supporting a decrease this would strengthen the conclusion made in this argument.
Moreover, the author makes the assumption that global warming is leading to ice melt in the artic deer habit. They base this assumption on global trends of sea ice melt caused by global warming. To strengthen this argument the author should provide data and research on the ice melt specially in the Canada’s arctic region. Information that supports that global warming is affecting this region would strengthen the argument, however if no information shows that there is ice melt in this area the argument would be weakened.
In addition, the author makes an assumption about the migration patterns of the deer being the cause of the decrease in the populations. Many other factors could be leading to a decline in the population. For example, a disease could be killing off the deer. Another possibility is that their food sources are being depleted by either completion or habitat conditions. The deer could also be declining due to hunting practices in the area. Unstainable hunting could be reducing the populations too much to rebound in the next season. The author would need to find out the information on these subjects in order to strengthen their argument and prove that migration is truly the cause of the decline.
In conclusion, the author comes to the conclusion that deer population decline in the Canadian artic is caused by disruptions in migration patterns. To better prove and support this argument the author needs to provide more of the specific evidence mentions above. The assumptions made by the author may be correct, but more information is needed in order to strengthen the argument or show that the argument is weak.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not OK
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- OK
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 415 350
No. of Characters: 2046 1500
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.513 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.93 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.551 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.864 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.683 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.409 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.348 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.542 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.104 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 397, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ations of Canada's arctic regions. If they find that there truly is more data...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, may, moreover, so, then, for example, in addition, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 28.8173652695 104% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 55.5748502994 103% => OK
Nominalization: 30.0 16.3942115768 183% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2096.0 2260.96107784 93% => OK
No of words: 415.0 441.139720559 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05060240964 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51348521516 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67370436306 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 165.0 204.123752495 81% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.397590361446 0.468620217663 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 648.0 705.55239521 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 35.2567032487 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.2727272727 119.503703932 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8636363636 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.0 5.70786347227 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0982338382515 0.218282227539 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0375921809007 0.0743258471296 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0407629345871 0.0701772020484 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0596089076848 0.128457276422 46% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0335166039945 0.0628817314937 53% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.8 14.3799401198 82% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.3550499002 110% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.01 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.07 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 98.500998004 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 12.3882235529 61% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.