The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of video rental stores."In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are fam

The issue about the decreasing profitability of Movies Galore is complex and needs to account both micro and macroeconomic factors of company’s performance. The consideration of solely operating expenses may lead to the loss of competitiveness and short-term solution of the problem. To provide Movies Galore with a long-term growth, it is crucial to elaborate more on its internal and external business environments.

The claim on growing operating expenses of a company cannot fully characterize the issue. Primarily, each of firm’s shops could have own influential factor that reduces the profit, such as improper client service, low local demand for movies or the opening of another movie rental stores in a region. For example, when the overall tendency for buying movies falls down, the decrease of operating expenditures will not help company in restoring its profits. Therefore, it is essential for Movies Galore to conduct a complex market analysis and monitor which tendencies have changed and how they affect company’s performance.

The option of closing the store earlier than usual seems to be vague and not effective in all company’s branches. To back up this claim, it is necessary to verify the frequency of visits to each Movies Galore store per hour. For instance, when one store is more attended in daily time, another one can be most visited in the evening when people return home from their jobs and want to buy a movie in order to relax after hard day. Based on this, each store of company’s network should analyze when on average it has the ‘hottest’ visiting hours and adjust working schedule in correspondence with this analysis.

The additional evidence for weakening the argument may be a number of cinemas that have recently opened. The more alternatives to movie rental store appear in the market, the less clients will have each earlier established enterprise. Therefore, in order to compete with the cinemas Movies Galore needs to adopt innovations and adapt to the changing customer needs. Otherwise, it can lose competitiveness as Nokia has lost when smartphones with large screens were introduced in the market. In the example with Nokia, it did not follow the tendency and, consequently, lost a prevailing share of its customers. To prevent such outcome and recover the lost profitability, Movies Galore should invest its profit in innovation development.

In conclusion, Movies Galore is recommended to conduct a thorough market analysis before taking the simple decision on the reduction of operating costs. The problem may lie in the increasing number of competitors in movie market, change in consumer preferences or inadequate service offered to Movies Galore customers, and, thus, cannot be fully related to the working schedule of the company.

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Average: 5.2 (3 votes)
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 176, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun clients is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
... rental store appear in the market, the less clients will have each earlier establis...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
consequently, if, may, so, therefore, thus, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.6327345309 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 68.0 55.5748502994 122% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2389.0 2260.96107784 106% => OK
No of words: 446.0 441.139720559 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.35650224215 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.5955099915 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04172175355 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 239.0 204.123752495 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.535874439462 0.468620217663 114% => OK
syllable_count: 765.9 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9207664008 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.736842105 119.503703932 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.4736842105 23.324526521 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.89473684211 5.70786347227 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.207498599194 0.218282227539 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0663995060873 0.0743258471296 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0325947308977 0.0701772020484 46% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.120082123042 0.128457276422 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0226190330149 0.0628817314937 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.6 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 48.3550499002 82% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.1 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.38 8.32208582834 113% => OK
difficult_words: 130.0 98.500998004 132% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

argument 1 -- OK

argument 2 -- OK

argument 3 -- not OK. no external examples in argument essays.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 446 350
No. of Characters: 2292 1500
No. of Different Words: 228 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.596 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.139 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.783 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 187 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 83 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.474 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.87 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.526 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.531 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.039 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5