The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site."The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age

Essay topics:

The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site.

"The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age levels; there is no audition to attend the school. Second, the school offers instruction in nearly all musical instruments as well a wide range of styles and genres from classical to rock. Third, the faculty includes some of the most distinguished musicians in the area. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians."

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

while it may be true that Mozart school of musics can be great choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons, the author's argument does not make a cogent case for the genuine benefit children can learnt from school . Moreover, no audition for attending school may not lie in the result of the preeminence of music education, but could be ascribed to other possible reasons. Convincing as the argument may sound, it suffers from several questionable assumptions, which, if not justified, would negatively influence the persuasion of the music Web site.

To start off, although the author provides information concerning the bright future of graduates from Mozart School of music, we need more evidence to demonstrate. For example, the survey's sample about the Mozart graduates' job may not sufficient in size or representative of the quality. only a small number of students give feedback, who are more confident and enthusiastic than other alumni for the reason that they have become a highly paid professional musicians. it is impertinent ot regard them as the whole graduates. For that matter, the conclusion of the survey is not strong enough to establish causation between .

Additionally, the author implies that there is no audition for youngsters to attend school, since it only demonstrates the standard of the school admission, whereas shows no evidence about the educational quality of music. we do not know whether children can get excellent knowledge from there, which plays an crucial role in determining whether the Mozart school of music should be the first choice. we need more consideration to validate the assertion.

Even if aforementioned explanations remain tenable, it is worthwhile examine the relationship between the wide range of musical instrument, music genres and educational quality in school lessons. we can not safely assume if the school provides various of facilities, the music lesson will offer children more first-class knowledge. However, we can not deny it is a great advance to provide copious lessons for diverse learning, we also need to concern whether there will be latent irresponsibility due to multifarious instructions, which divert the teacher's attention. All of the above assumptions pose a great challenge upon, if not utterly reverse, the proposed one in the argument.

To sum up, the evidence cited by author does not significantly persuade the Mozart School of music will be the first choice for children in music lessons . while the proposal does highlight a possibility, more explanation is required to warrant the action.

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Average: 4.8 (3 votes)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
while it may be true that Mozart school of mu...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 139, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...lling their child in music lessons, the authors argument does not make a cogent case fo...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 239, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... benefit children can learnt from school . Moreover, no audition for attending sch...
^^
Line 1, column 567, Rule ID: WEB_SITE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'website'?
Suggestion: Website
...y influence the persuasion of the music Web site. To start off, although the author pro...
^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 235, Rule ID: ADJECTIVE_IN_ATTRIBUTE[1]
Message: A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
Suggestion: sufficient
... about the Mozart graduates job may not sufficient in size or representative of the quality. only ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 288, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Only
... size or representative of the quality. only a small number of students give feedbac...
^^^^
Line 2, column 293, Rule ID: SMALL_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, use 'a few', or use 'some'
Suggestion: a few; some
... or representative of the quality. only a small number of students give feedback, who are more co...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 468, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...e a highly paid professional musicians. it is impertinent ot regard them as the wh...
^^
Line 2, column 622, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ng enough to establish causation between . Additionally, the author implies that ...
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Line 3, column 223, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...about the educational quality of music. we do not know whether children can get ex...
^^
Line 3, column 307, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'a' instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
Suggestion: a
...llent knowledge from there, which plays an crucial role in determining whether the...
^^
Line 3, column 401, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...ol of music should be the first choice. we need more consideration to validate the...
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Line 4, column 196, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
... educational quality in school lessons. we can not safely assume if the school pro...
^^
Line 4, column 549, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'teachers'' or 'teacher's'?
Suggestion: teachers'; teacher's
...ifarious instructions, which divert the teachers attention. All of the above assumptions...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 569, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: All the
...s, which divert the teachers attention. All of the above assumptions pose a great challeng...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 154, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...rst choice for children in music lessons . while the proposal does highlight a pos...
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Line 5, column 156, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
... choice for children in music lessons . while the proposal does highlight a possibili...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, if, may, moreover, so, thus, whereas, while, for example, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 19.6327345309 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.9520958084 139% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 50.0 55.5748502994 90% => OK
Nominalization: 19.0 16.3942115768 116% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2191.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 412.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.31796116505 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50530610838 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.98748150205 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 229.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.555825242718 0.468620217663 119% => OK
syllable_count: 678.6 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.70958083832 258% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.6122538438 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.882352941 119.503703932 108% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.2352941176 23.324526521 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.52941176471 5.70786347227 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.67664670659 64% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.412744918412 0.218282227539 189% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120180373428 0.0743258471296 162% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114219365341 0.0701772020484 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.238887824222 0.128457276422 186% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0751189267186 0.0628817314937 119% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 14.3799401198 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.69 8.32208582834 116% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 98.500998004 129% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 11 15
No. of Words: 412 350
No. of Characters: 2143 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.505 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.201 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.892 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 170 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 87 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 58 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 37.455 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.472 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.818 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.405 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.675 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.184 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5