The following is a letter from the parent of a private school student to the principal of that school:
Last year, Kensington Academy turned over management of its cafeteria to a private vendor, Swift Nutrition. This company serves low-fat, low-calorie meals that students do not find enjoyable – my son and several of his friends came home yesterday complaining about the lunch options. While the intent of hiring Swift may have been to cause students to eat healthier foods, the plan is just going to cause students to bring their own, less healthy lunches instead of eating cafeteria food. If Swift is not replaced with another vendor, there will be serious health consequences for Kensington students.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the prediction and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the prediction.
The parent of the student at Kensington Academy is concerned that the recent change in cafeteria vendor to Swift Nutrition, has caused her child and some other students to complain about the lunch options. He recognizes that the decision to bring in this food vendor was to ensure that kids are eating nutritious food but it seems to have backfired. They argue that in order to avoid eating at the cafeteria, these kids opt to bring their own food and that might be an unhealthy option. They posit that if the vendor isn't changed it could lead to serious health consequences. While this a serious accusation, the school authorities need to investigate the underlying assumptions here and get answers to vital questions before making a decision.
Firstly, we need to understand how many students are not liking the food options provided by Swift Nutrition. What tends to often happen with school kids is that they develop herd mentality within their social groups. In order to not against the dominant kids, the more submissive ones might just play along with an opinion that was offered to them. The school authorities need to conduct surveys to understand the percentage of kids who are genuinely unhappy with the cafeteria service.
Secondly, the school needs to investigate if the options provided by Swift Nutrition is actually restricted. What food vendors at cafeterias often do is provide a revolving menu that changes on a weekly basis. This way, students are excited to find out what what new items the cafeteria might have to offer at the start of the week. Additionally, vendors also mix up the menu to provide a mix of maincourse and deserts because deserts might be more favourable to most students. Now if Swift Nutrition isn't taking the effort to recreate their menu on a regular basis, then replacing them would make sense.
Lastly, we need to understand if budget is a concern while choosing Swift Nutrition. In today's day and age, the emphasis on eating healthy is massive. But innovative use of ingredients can end up creating dishes that are not a compromise on the pallet. Items such a faux-meat now exist in the market. They taste exactly like traditional meat, but are made solely out of plant based ingredients. Such measures, though available are considerably more expensive than traditional options of healthy food. If this is the case, and the school finds that Swift Nutrition is best available vendor that can maintain some balance between nutritious and tasty meals, then firing them would make no sense.
The option of eating tasty food appeals to one and all. While at the same time it has become increasingly important for children to understand the importance of eating healthy. Even while sacrificing taste sometimes. This will benefit them in the long run. Therefore with this as a priority and taking into consideration the above-mentioned enquiries, the school can arrive at a reasonable decision about the cafeteria vendor.
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2022-10-16 | Chaitanya02 | 70 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 496 350
No. of Characters: 2424 1500
No. of Different Words: 252 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.719 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.887 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.623 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 169 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 124 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 63 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.077 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.082 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.538 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.255 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.456 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.103 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 518, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...y option. They posit that if the vendor isnt changed it could lead to serious health...
^^^^
Line 3, column 50, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...we need to understand how many students are not liking the food options provided by Swift Nutr...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 254, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: what
...s way, students are excited to find out what what new items the cafeteria might have to o...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 502, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: isn't
...o most students. Now if Swift Nutrition isnt taking the effort to recreate their men...
^^^^
Line 7, column 565, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[4]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'is the best'.
Suggestion: is the best
...d the school finds that Swift Nutrition is best available vendor that can maintain some...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 178, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[2]
Message: “Even while” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...stand the importance of eating healthy. Even while sacrificing taste sometimes. This will ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 258, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...This will benefit them in the long run. Therefore with this as a priority and taking into...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, first, firstly, if, lastly, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, while, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.9520958084 116% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 28.8173652695 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 69.0 55.5748502994 124% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2481.0 2260.96107784 110% => OK
No of words: 494.0 441.139720559 112% => OK
Chars per words: 5.02226720648 5.12650576532 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.71445763274 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68635380142 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 254.0 204.123752495 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.514170040486 0.468620217663 110% => OK
syllable_count: 768.6 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 42.854870678 57.8364921388 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 95.4230769231 119.503703932 80% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.0 23.324526521 81% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.84615384615 5.70786347227 67% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 5.25449101796 133% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.153285348633 0.218282227539 70% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0402693628246 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0430776034144 0.0701772020484 61% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0892464310078 0.128457276422 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0263589585048 0.0628817314937 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.3799401198 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.3550499002 108% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.84 12.5979740519 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.48 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 122.0 98.500998004 124% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.