The following was written as a part of an application for a small-business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, the proposed new jazz club in Monroe, the C-Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's annual jazz festival last summer; several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe; and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight at 7 P.M. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The developers in the city of monroe proposes a blueprint that a jazz music club in monroe can be rewarding due to a lack of competitors and the zeal to jazz among local residents. However, before some critical questions have been settled, the developers' plan is at most specious.
First, despite the nearest jazz club is over 60 miles away at present, we need to figure out whether there are other jazz clubs around monroe in plan. Otherwise, we cannot hastily assume our proposed club will embody all the local market to itself. If there are plenty of venturer discovering this opportunity, an...
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 481 350
No. of Characters: 2366 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.683 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.919 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.692 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 169 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 123 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 82 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 34.357 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.202 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.786 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.383 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.626 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.16 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 263, Rule ID: LOTS_OF_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun venturer seems to be countable; consider using: 'plenty of venturers'.
Suggestion: plenty of venturers
...he local market to itself. If there are plenty of venturer discovering this opportunity, and consi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 408, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Before
...ub will face a competitive environment. before a thorough investigation about the futu...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 297, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Perhaps
...these participants are local residents. perhaps only local residents are not favor of s...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 529, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...oes not indicate jazz is popular there. it could be argued that their success is l...
^^
Line 7, column 823, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ents from the high-rated radio program. it could be equally possible that people w...
^^
Line 10, column 29, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'residents'' or 'resident's'?
Suggestion: residents'; resident's
...ogram. Finally, some survey on the residents zeal in jazz is also questionable. The ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 483, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Perhaps
...cetages of such fans in the population. perhaps such fans are so few that their consump...
^^^^^^^
Line 10, column 568, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'clubs'' or 'club's'?
Suggestion: clubs'; club's
...mption does not contribute a lot to the clubs income. before a local survey about the...
^^^^^
Line 10, column 582, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Before
...t contribute a lot to the clubs income. before a local survey about the consumption ab...
^^^^^^
Line 13, column 142, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'developers'' or 'developer's'?
Suggestion: developers'; developer's
...ral critical questions. To strength the developers argument, they are supposed to conduct ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, finally, first, however, if, moreover, so, thus, in addition, in summary, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 25.0 28.8173652695 87% => OK
Preposition: 71.0 55.5748502994 128% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2453.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 481.0 441.139720559 109% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09979209979 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68313059816 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.80894339424 2.78398813304 101% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.474012474012 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 778.5 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 10.0 4.96107784431 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.67365269461 299% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.0279732452 57.8364921388 90% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.65 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.05 23.324526521 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.05 5.70786347227 88% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 5.25449101796 190% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.186737067811 0.218282227539 86% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0608135845762 0.0743258471296 82% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0483194221878 0.0701772020484 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.117733520893 0.128457276422 92% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0284420526065 0.0628817314937 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.6 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 48.3550499002 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.6 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.57 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 98.500998004 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.