The argument about making association between the amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms is a very simplistic view. Lack of strong evidence and statistical numbers to prove this acclaim is one of main weak points of this argument. The author could bring more witness about this assumption in order to convince the readers about the correlation between these variables.
The author does not consider other certain factors when he or she wants to render his argument because he or she generalizes the result of one recent study to other businesses. The writer could explain whether this recent study is reliable or not since by rating only 300 male and female without considering other factors, the results could not be persuasive. Maybe, the success of the firms was due to specific factors that were be omitted by researcher.
The other weak point of this argument is that rendering certain number like 6 hours for sleeping per night without bringing strong evidence why this number is appropriate. It is more likely that higher profit margins and faster growth of advertising firms had other reasons like setting reasonable goals and having brilliant workers. The author could support the argument with rendering statistic numbers that were related to consider the impact of other factors on the success of advertising firms in comparison with the amount of sleep of the executives on that. Moreover, the author could take key factors into account that have significant impact on increasing the profit margins of the firms and do not have any relation with the amount of sleep of executives.
The author also failed in his or her conclusion because of using weak results and generalizing the weak results for all business. The author could consider other key factors in order to render the conclusion and avoid developing the results of mentioned study for other business. Maybe this assumption about hiring people who need less than 6 hours of sleep per night was for only the advertising firms.
In conclusion, the argument brings weak evidence without strong support while the writer could render persuasive document in order to convince the readers. The author does not pay attention to other key factors about investigating the main reasons that have important role on the success of advertising firms.
- A recent study rating 300 male and female Mentian advertising executives according to the average number of hours they sleep per night showed an association between the amount of sleep the executives need and the success of their firms. Of the advertising 58
- Issue: Parents should be able to monitor and restrict which books, digital media, or other information their children access or check out of the public library. 50
- “The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the la 58
- "Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increasingly more time to covering national news and less time to covering weather and local news. During the same time period, most of the complaints we received from viewers were concerned wit 50
- A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college. 50
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 178, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...f one recent study to other businesses. The writer could explain whether this recen...
^^^
Line 3, column 431, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'been'.
Suggestion: been
...s was due to specific factors that were be omitted by researcher. The other wea...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, may, moreover, so, while, as for, in conclusion, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 24.0 28.8173652695 83% => OK
Preposition: 59.0 55.5748502994 106% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1965.0 2260.96107784 87% => OK
No of words: 384.0 441.139720559 87% => OK
Chars per words: 5.1171875 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4267276788 4.56307096286 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.55706226695 2.78398813304 92% => OK
Unique words: 169.0 204.123752495 83% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.440104166667 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 595.8 705.55239521 84% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.471057884232 0% => OK
Article: 13.0 8.76447105788 148% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 33.2643285752 57.8364921388 58% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 131.0 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.6 23.324526521 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.4 5.70786347227 77% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.221191053391 0.218282227539 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0829945741559 0.0743258471296 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0847805655163 0.0701772020484 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.120658882671 0.128457276422 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0409399952213 0.0628817314937 65% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.3550499002 95% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.88 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 98.500998004 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.