The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president. (94)
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In this recommendation, the vice president of human resources at Clemson Industries claims that, to raise the company's productivity, this company has to install software to detect employees' private using of company computers. To support her argument, She points out that there are people who spend work hours recreational activities shopping or playing games. Careful scrutiny reveals that this argument have several logical flaws.
First, the vice president hastily assumes that most effective means to improve productivity is preventing time of workers from wasting time. Common sense tells us that there are many factors which affect workers' productivity. For example, division of labor or policies of the company or even, competence of executives. we should know why she think the most important ways to improve overall profits is preventing the workers from using computer for personal purpose to rate this argument properly
Second, she also hastily assumes that only by installing the software which detects Internet use, the company can block employees' deviation. However, there are many ways to detour any software. Also there are a possibility that one of employees have ability to hack the software, as a result all workers could know the way to break the program. Until she presents us how stable the software is, we cannot be convinced by this argument.
Finally, even if we admit other problematic assumptions, still there are a critical assumption. The workers personal usage of computer could not curtail productivity, rather than increasing the efficiency. There are many examples that although a corporation has the companies have free work environment, the profit of the company increases, such as Google, Facebook. Rather than prohibit free atmosphere, these companies promote their workers to stay freely and creative. If she cannot explain why she thinks their workers' recreational activities are harmful for the company, this argument is not persuasive.
To summarize, this argument is dubious as it stands. To make this argument more precise, the vice president has to give us data about stability of the software and explains why she thinks that the most harmful way to hinder for raising profit is personal usage of computer. To evaluate better, she must explain us how she think other examples that are different from her recommendation.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
need to argue more on this:
By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 372 350
No. of Characters: 1949 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.392 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.239 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.666 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 128 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 80 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.684 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.551 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.169 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 183, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ommon sense tells us that there are many factors which affect workers productivit...
^^
Line 3, column 321, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...pany or even, competence of executives. we should know why she think the most impo...
^^
Line 3, column 344, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'thinks'.
Suggestion: thinks
...e of executives. we should know why she think the most important ways to improve over...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 195, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Also,
...e are many ways to detour any software. Also there are a possibility that one of emp...
^^^^
Line 7, column 85, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'assumptions'?
Suggestion: assumptions
...assumptions, still there are a critical assumption. The workers personal usage of computer...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 275, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...g profit is personal usage of computer. To evaluate better, she must explain us ho...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, however, if, second, so, still, as to, for example, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 11.1786427146 45% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 13.0 13.6137724551 95% => OK
Pronoun: 40.0 28.8173652695 139% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 37.0 55.5748502994 67% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2005.0 2260.96107784 89% => OK
No of words: 372.0 441.139720559 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.38978494624 5.12650576532 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39173103935 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.79027984926 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 204.123752495 98% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.537634408602 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 630.9 705.55239521 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.0102171291 57.8364921388 114% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.388888889 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.6666666667 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.22222222222 5.70786347227 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.20758483034 110% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.115255837769 0.218282227539 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0352155108885 0.0743258471296 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0501527161381 0.0701772020484 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0717983507335 0.128457276422 56% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0417771480394 0.0628817314937 66% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.98 12.5979740519 111% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.17 8.32208582834 110% => OK
difficult_words: 107.0 98.500998004 109% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 83.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.