"Advertising with Cable Communications Corp. is a great way to increase your profits. Recently the Adams Car Dealership began advertising with Cable Communications and over the last 30 days, sales are up 15% over the previous month. Let us increase your profit, just as we did for Adams Cars!"
Recently Adam Car Dealership has seen a increase in sales -- up 15% from the previous month to be exact. This is due to the adverstisement deal they made with Cable Communication Corp, the cable company exclaimed. This argument is plausible, however, when compared to other car dealerships, are other car dealerships seeing the same sales increase? Has the cable company considered if this increase is due to busy sale season? Or that Adam Car Dealership is having a good month?
Certainly having an advertisement about a company on television helps increase sales, because of public exposure. However, it does not always guarantee sales. People could come out to look at cars, and if they like what they see they will buy it. Cable Communication Corp may helped put the dealership's name out there, but it is the car salesman themselves that have to convience the customers to purchase it. So in advertising that the cable network can help increase dealership's sales is plausible.
Another factor that is important is to see if this is the car buying season. The best time to buy cars is towards the end of the year when dealerships want to get rid of last year's models to make room for new cars. If the time of Adam Dealership's adverstisement on cable TV coincide with the busy season, the 15% increase sales would be a coincedence and is unrelated to the involvement with Cable Communication Corp. To see if this is the doing of the cable company or busy season, the company can look at statistics of other car dealerships from the same month that the increase in sales took place.
The last factor is the dealership's reputation. The best way to make sales is through words of mouth. People trust people. The increase in car sales could very well be that Adam Car Dealership has an ethical way of doing business. People see that, they respect the way the dealership treat them and are happy with their purchase so therefore they spread the good words.
There are many factors to consider in the increase of car sales at Adam Car Dealership. Cable Communication Corp cannot assume the increase in sales is solely due to their advertisement. Yes, it may have helped, but at the end it is the job of the salesman/woman push for that sale. In order to have a more holistic view of factors that helped increased the car sales, we have to compare sales with other dealerships, the season, and the dealership's reputation.
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Sentence: Cable Communication Corp may helped put the dealership's name out there, but it is the car salesman themselves that have to convience the customers to purchase it.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to may and helped
Sentence: If the time of Adam Dealership's adverstisement on cable TV coincide with the busy season, the 15 increase sales would be a coincedence and is unrelated to the involvement with Cable Communication Corp.
Description: The fragment TV coincide with is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace coincide with verb, past participle
Sentence: People see that, they respect the way the dealership treat them and are happy with their purchase so therefore they spread the good words.
Description: The word respect is not usually used as a verb, base: uninflected Description: The fragment dealership treat them is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace treat with verb, past tense
Sentence: This is due to the adverstisement deal they made with Cable Communication Corp, the cable company exclaimed.
Error: adverstisement Suggestion: advertisement
Sentence: Cable Communication Corp may helped put the dealership's name out there, but it is the car salesman themselves that have to convience the customers to purchase it.
Error: convience Suggestion: convince
Sentence: If the time of Adam Dealership's adverstisement on cable TV coincide with the busy season, the 15 increase sales would be a coincedence and is unrelated to the involvement with Cable Communication Corp. To see if this is the doing of the cable company or busy season, the company can look at statistics of other car dealerships from the same month that the increase in sales took place.
Error: coincedence Suggestion: coincidence
Error: adverstisement Suggestion: advertisement
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 1954 1500
No. of Different Words: 177 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.63 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.686 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 109 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 83 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.182 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.63 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.515 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.056 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5