"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."-Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agre

Essay topics:

"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
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Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

Leadership is a quality that not many people have. Those who are good leaders have one thing in common and that is having a good sense of cooperation. The prompt suggests that to prepare youngsters for leadership in any institution, be it government or any other fields, they should be motivated to imbibe the idea of cooperation and not competition. I agree with this suggestion and shall be putting forth my case with two reasons.

First of all, in our increasingly globalized world, having harmony among different groups can prove to be a lot more productive than having a sense of competing against each other. A government, for example, can only function if there is harmony among its members and at the helm of it is a person who knows how to lead with the help of each other. Since the younger generation of today will make the government of tomorrow, it is imperative that they learn from an early stage how to complete any given task by not competing against each other but by working with each other. Moreover, if people carry out any work with a mindset of defeating others by completing it earlier than others then the output is bound to fail because not much emphasis is laid on the quality of work. So, the sense of competition can prove to be disadvantageous here.

Furthermore, in any industry, any task is divided among groups and not carried out individually. So, knowing how to cooperate with each other will prove helpful in these situations. In any IT job, for instance, there are several teams and each team has a team leader. If the leader carries the impression of leading without the cooperation of others will be more beneficial, then he or she could not be farther away from truth. To complete any task in any industry, not just the IT industry, it is important that cooperation is prevalent among the members of the team. If the team leader takes help of others to complete his or her job then the job will be well done. So, it is important that the leader is cooperative and not just competitive.

In conclusion, it can be argued that having a sense of competition can make a person work hard, but in today's world working hard is not always the right answer. Good leaders must know the importance of helping others and asking for help at times of need. For this to happen, they should learn about cooperation from an early age.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 654, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...rk with a mindset of defeating others by completing it earlier than others then t...
^^
Line 5, column 193, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'jobs'?
Suggestion: jobs
... helpful in these situations. In any IT job, for instance, there are several teams ...
^^^
Line 5, column 476, Rule ID: DT_PRP[1]
Message: Possible typo. Did you mean 'the' or 'IT'?
Suggestion: the; IT
...lete any task in any industry, not just the IT industry, it is important that cooperat...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 202, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...Good leaders must know the importance of helping others and asking for help at ti...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, if, moreover, so, then, well, for example, for instance, in conclusion, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.5258426966 123% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 12.4196629213 121% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 14.8657303371 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.3162921348 80% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 31.0 33.0505617978 94% => OK
Preposition: 64.0 58.6224719101 109% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 12.9106741573 132% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1946.0 2235.4752809 87% => OK
No of words: 420.0 442.535393258 95% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.63333333333 5.05705443957 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.52701905584 4.55969084622 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.64322605748 2.79657885939 95% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 215.323595506 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.464285714286 0.4932671777 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 606.6 704.065955056 86% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59117977528 88% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 3.0 4.99550561798 60% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.77640449438 56% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 52.1435266205 60.3974514979 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.421052632 118.986275619 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1052631579 23.4991977007 94% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.73684210526 5.21951772744 110% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.83258426966 103% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.111332835913 0.243740707755 46% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0406702804875 0.0831039109588 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0290558795992 0.0758088955206 38% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0781050564055 0.150359130593 52% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0211056362233 0.0667264976115 32% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.4 14.1392134831 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 66.07 48.8420337079 135% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.57 12.1639044944 79% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.28 8.38706741573 87% => OK
difficult_words: 68.0 100.480337079 68% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.7820224719 85% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.


Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.