Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
It is often encouraged in our society that young people should follow their dreams. How realistic such an advice is depends on how we envision our society should be. Nonetheless, everyone would agree that they want the best for their fututre generation and their society.
In today's world, the advice to young people "follow your dreams" has become very common and prevalent. The reason elderly people give this advice to younger generations is becuase they think this would be the best for these young people and the society. But we have to keep in mind the practicality of such an advice. Usually younger people are very naive with very limited knowledge of real world. Just telling them "follow your dreams" without giving them some idea of what result they should expect of such life choices, would not be prudent. Following the advice, one may wish to become something but then later on, they might find that such a decision might have been impractical.
Therefore, society should not tell its young people to just follow their dreams, but also tell them what consequences and hardships they might be face for it. This is not becuase people are selfish but becuase it would bring the best result. For example, one may become very interested in becoming a doctor. Before making the choice of choosing the profession, they should be told that they need to be studious and be very current with science and medicine thoroughout their career.
In conclusion, even if young people act selfishly, it may still bring a halcyon environment for the society. What younger people should be taught is that how practical and rational their dreams are and what impact such dreams can bring in their society.
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2020-01-09 | Mridul | 50 | view |
2019-12-02 | Opak Pulu | 50 | view |
2019-10-31 | solankis304 | 58 | view |
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- Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish. 50
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 104, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'advice'.
Suggestion: advice
...follow their dreams. How realistic such an advice is depends on how we envision our socie...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... fututre generation and their society. In todays world, the advice to young peo...
^^^
Line 3, column 318, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[1]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'advice'.
Suggestion: advice
...o keep in mind the practicality of such an advice. Usually younger people are very naive ...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, if, may, nonetheless, so, still, then, therefore, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.5258426966 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 12.4196629213 145% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 5.0 11.3162921348 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 37.0 33.0505617978 112% => OK
Preposition: 23.0 58.6224719101 39% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 3.0 12.9106741573 23% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1439.0 2235.4752809 64% => OK
No of words: 288.0 442.535393258 65% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.99652777778 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.11953428781 4.55969084622 90% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46813947756 2.79657885939 88% => OK
Unique words: 145.0 215.323595506 67% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.503472222222 0.4932671777 102% => OK
syllable_count: 425.7 704.065955056 60% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.77640449438 113% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.38483146067 91% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 20.2370786517 74% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 36.025299752 60.3974514979 60% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 95.9333333333 118.986275619 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.2 23.4991977007 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.8 5.21951772744 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 7.80617977528 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 10.2758426966 78% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.83258426966 83% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.292039157612 0.243740707755 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.108459417445 0.0831039109588 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101660414744 0.0758088955206 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.178442229774 0.150359130593 119% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0661048336429 0.0667264976115 99% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.7 14.1392134831 83% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.8420337079 124% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.1743820225 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.72 12.1639044944 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.48 8.38706741573 89% => OK
difficult_words: 53.0 100.480337079 53% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.