Prompt: “’The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.’ Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.”
The contention that a sense of competion must be instilled in our youth is not a trivial one. In fact, this argument has lead to many debates and discussions among scholars as well. The prompt suggests that young people can be made better leaders by making them more cooperative from early on. I mostly disagree with this suggestion and argue why youth must be made more competitive in nature, for three reasons.
To begin, competition is the marker most widely used to judge any person. right from primary school to the end of their lives, people constantly compete among each other. For instance, a company trying to recruit students out of college, never chooses candidates based on how cooperative they are. Instead the companies look for the applicant's grades through school, and how tehy fared in college. In essence, they try to identify how the candidate has fared against her "competition". we observe the same pattern when applying for graduate or undergraduate school. The primary aspect of one's eligibility into a university is their gre score. The gre is, you guessed right, "a competitive exam", which judges the test-taker;s standing against the other test-takers. these examples elucidate my claim that competitiveness, not cooperation, helps mould better leaders.
Secondly, the sense of competetion is instilled inside humans by nature. Every person is highly competitive in nayture, whether he likes it or not. Researchers have proved that twin babies inside a mother's womb, compete with one another for recources such as nutrients. right from the beginning of mankind, people fought among each other for leadership. The popular biblical story of Kane and Abel validates this. another situation is of cooperation between countries. Not a day passes by, when we do not come across news that two particular countries have decided to partner and share their recources. but did the USA become the world superpower by cooperating with its competitiors? No. In fact it stood firm ready to face war with the USSR, until it became the world leader. these examples show that it is again competetion that makes great leaders.
but cooperation is not always a bane. In situations where team activity leads to success, cooperation is the better option. The best sport teams in the world, are where they are due to the entire team's combined effort and not due to an individual performance. The same is true for teams with big cooperations too.
we saw that both options have their pros and cons. most leaders of major cooperations and powerful countries are all highly competitive people. but a team player is the one who facilitates a leader's rise to the top. Overall this is a very complex issue and there is no easy answer to
- Removed 50
- The following is taken from a memo from the advertising director of the Super Screen Movie Production Company According to a recent report from our marketing department during the past year fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any ot 60
- Prompt: “’The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.’ Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you 50
- 'The following is a memorandum from the business manager of a television station.“Over the past year, our late-night news program has devoted increased time to national news and less time to weather and local news. During this time period, most of 59
- Schools should do more to prepare students for the non-academic aspects of adulthood. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developi 50
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 75, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Right
...r most widely used to judge any person. right from primary school to the end of their...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 299, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Instead,
...ates based on how cooperative they are. Instead the companies look for the applicants g...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 497, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...ed against her 'competition'. we observe the same pattern when applying ...
^^
Line 7, column 599, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...rgraduate school. The primary aspect of ones eligibility into a university is their ...
^^^^
Line 7, column 787, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: These
...standing against the other test-takers. these examples elucidate my claim that compet...
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Line 7, column 859, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...m that competitiveness, not cooperation, helps mould better leaders. Seco...
^^
Line 13, column 199, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'mothers'' or 'mother's'?
Suggestion: mothers'; mother's
...s have proved that twin babies inside a mothers womb, compete with one another for reco...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 271, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Right
...nother for recources such as nutrients. right from the beginning of mankind, people f...
^^^^^
Line 13, column 415, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Another
... story of Kane and Abel validates this. another situation is of cooperation between cou...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 604, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...d to partner and share their recources. but did the USA become the world superpower...
^^^
Line 13, column 779, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: These
...USSR, until it became the world leader. these examples show that it is again competet...
^^^^^
Line 19, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...etion that makes great leaders. but cooperation is not always a bane. In si...
^^^
Line 25, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: We
...eams with big cooperations too. we saw that both options have their pros a...
^^
Line 25, column 52, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Most
... both options have their pros and cons. most leaders of major cooperations and power...
^^^^
Line 25, column 145, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: But
...ries are all highly competitive people. but a team player is the one who facilitate...
^^^
Line 25, column 190, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a leader' or simply 'leaders'?
Suggestion: a leader; leaders
... team player is the one who facilitates a leaders rise to the top. Overall this is a very...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, look, second, secondly, so, still, well, for instance, in fact, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 12.4196629213 24% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 14.8657303371 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.3162921348 124% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 57.0 58.6224719101 97% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 12.9106741573 116% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2332.0 2235.4752809 104% => OK
No of words: 455.0 442.535393258 103% => OK
Chars per words: 5.12527472527 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61852021839 4.55969084622 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87085803662 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 275.0 215.323595506 128% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.604395604396 0.4932671777 123% => OK
syllable_count: 723.6 704.065955056 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 6.24550561798 128% => OK
Article: 10.0 4.99550561798 200% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 2.0 3.10617977528 64% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 31.0 20.2370786517 153% => OK
Sentence length: 14.0 23.0359550562 61% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 25.2736119908 60.3974514979 42% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 75.2258064516 118.986275619 63% => OK
Words per sentence: 14.6774193548 23.4991977007 62% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.58064516129 5.21951772744 49% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 7.80617977528 205% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 10.2758426966 136% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 13.0 4.83258426966 269% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.176888083717 0.243740707755 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0353668397206 0.0831039109588 43% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0495328522676 0.0758088955206 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0760959758365 0.150359130593 51% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0629166265037 0.0667264976115 94% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 14.1392134831 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 57.27 48.8420337079 117% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.8 12.1743820225 72% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.88 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.29 8.38706741573 99% => OK
difficult_words: 114.0 100.480337079 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 11.8971910112 67% => OK
gunning_fog: 7.6 11.2143820225 68% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.