You work for an international company. You have seen an advertisement for a training course which will be useful for your job.Write a letter to your manager. In your letter:Describe the training course you want to doExplain what the company could do to he

Dear Mr. Brown,

I am writing this letter to ask if Building Information Modelling (BIM) course fee will be subsidised by Miten Group given the fact that it will lead to innumerable positive impacts on quality of quantity of projects.

First of all, I would like t attend BIM course which is held between 20 and 23 June in Ankara, Hilton Hotel. Three BIM modelist who are world renowed çivil engineers will teach how to use this cutting edge tool and will do some real life examples to make participants master effectively. Participants who will be able to pass exam at the end of it, will get a certificate which shows proficiency.

Secondly, Miten Group could subsidise its fee since it ,is too affluent for a worker. Further and more importantly, it is too difficult for me to order BIM program which is only available for companies’ purchase thus if it is ordered for company, many enginners will be able to use it in later projects.

Lastly, it is a magic tool which computes amount of materials and duration of projects accurately consequently the company will not have to purchase more materials than needed. It is also one of the best design tools therefore many professionals here will design mesmerising structures which will appeal more customers. Consequently, the profit of company will rise gradually in the near future. I hope my interest and enthusisasm which will bring several positive elements into company’s future will be awarded.

Thank you for consideration in this matter,
Yours sincerely,
Mary Brown

Votes
Average: 8.9 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 55, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...n Group could subsidise its fee since it ,is too affluent for a worker. Further an...
^^
Line 14, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... matter, Yours sincerely, Mary Brown
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, consequently, first, if, lastly, second, secondly, so, therefore, thus, first of all

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 7.48453608247 160% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 4.92783505155 304% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 5.0 5.05154639175 99% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 3.03092783505 297% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 20.0 32.9175257732 61% => OK
Preposition: 28.0 26.3917525773 106% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 3.85567010309 78% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1302.0 937.175257732 139% => OK
No of words: 257.0 206.0 125% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06614785992 4.54256449028 112% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.00390054096 3.78020617076 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.90333392988 2.54303337028 114% => OK
Unique words: 167.0 127.690721649 131% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.649805447471 0.622605031667 104% => OK
syllable_count: 406.8 290.88556701 140% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.41237113402 113% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 9.13402061856 77% => OK
Article: 1.0 0.824742268041 121% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 1.83505154639 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 1.44329896907 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 12.6804123711 87% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 16.3608247423 141% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 54.3580112626 44.8134815571 121% => OK
Chars per sentence: 118.363636364 76.5299724578 155% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.3636363636 16.8248392259 139% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.18181818182 4.34317383033 188% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.29896907216 116% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 2.54639175258 79% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 7.41237113402 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.49484536082 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.94845360825 76% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.244784019589 0.216113520407 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0879874730701 0.0766984524023 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0561298301062 0.0603063233224 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.130191707517 0.12726935374 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0452058164046 0.0580467560999 78% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 8.37731958763 168% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 70.7449484536 68% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 3.82989690722 230% => Smog_index is high.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 7.45979381443 165% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.42 8.71597938144 142% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.02 7.59969072165 119% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 41.2886597938 167% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 8.62886597938 162% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 8.54432989691 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 8.15463917526 172% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.