Nowadays, people care about their appearance more than before. Do you agree or disagree?

Essay topics:

Nowadays, people care about their appearance more than before. Do you agree or disagree?

In this glamorous world, fashion is supposed to be the first need of hour. Undeniably, The existence of innovative fads allures people to adopt new trends to be more appealing than others at present compared to past. Here, I would like to accord with given statement.

Multifarious points can be put down to shore up my view. First and foremost, the vital function to encourage this phenomenon is played by prominent celebrities of sports, movies, music, fashion and so on. For example, renown personalities have to show dead drop beauty in diffrent manners by using cosmetics to have fair skin, ha...

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Sentence: For example, renown personalities have to show dead drop beauty in diffrent manners by using cosmetics to have fair skin, hair colours and wearing exclusive outfits, gogals, footwears.
Error: gogals Suggestion: goals
Error: diffrent Suggestion: different
Error: colours Suggestion: colors

Sentence: Furthermore, adopting distinct styles of wearing, using cosmetics to look dead drop gorgeous is an exotic way to introduce pleasure in life whenever people feel fed up from current apperance.
Error: apperance Suggestion: appearance

Sentence: What is more, the role of advertisements, Beauty parlours, Hair saloons, shopping malls and show rooms to stimulate people towards mesmerizing looks is terrific.
Error: mesmerizing Suggestion: memorizing

Sentence: Moreover, representing different looking styles is mandatory for film stars, modals and some other professionals like counsellers, receptionists to impress their spectators, clients and customers.
Error: counsellers Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: Ultimately, the widespread availability of magazines, books and online portals realted to recipies, formulas, fitness courses to enhance physical beauty diverts people towards fads.
Error: recipies Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: realted Suggestion: related

flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2

The essay is not exactly right on the topic. The topic is 'people care about their appearance more than before.'. You need to compare.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 305 350
No. of Characters: 1629 1500
No. of Different Words: 206 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.179 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.341 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.885 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 129 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 101 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 48 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.062 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.369 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.285 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.032 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5