In some countries young people are encouraged to work and travel for a year between finishing a highschool and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

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In some countries young people are encouraged to work and travel for a year between finishing a highschool and starting university studies.
Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Over the last two or three decades the way that students are inspired to spend a year before university. As a result, there is a growing number of students working and traveling to foreign countries. However is this process positive or are there more drawbacks than advantages? In thiss esay I will explore the pros and cons and try to draw some conclusions.

I will start by looking at the advantages. One major plus points is that students get experience by working or travelling abroad. By way of illustration, a huge range of people do not have linear future plans, so they can embody or realise theirselves by doing this. In other words, they are catalyzed to be independent and take care of themselves, indeed it is marvelous experience. If they did work abroad it migh well help to reach their goals. Secondly, working in a foreign country pupils can earn money for their studies. For instance, income will be the preculsor of their early career. Also, by working with correlated people will open avenues to the future life. Clearly, this is not the case that students will be prepared for their future.

On the other hand, it can be very distractive for their studies. By wasting one year of studies may affect their career. For example,mentally it is more difficult to memorize information at older age. So students might not be afforded by employees because of their low marks. It can dramatically recall in the future.

To conclude there are both pros and cons. My personal point of view there is a merit in both sides. My belief though travelling abroad has more advantages.

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2015-05-07 gele2727 80 view
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the way that students are inspired to spend a year before university.
Description: what is the verb for 'the way'? can you re-write this sentence?

indeed it is marvelous experience.
indeed it is a marvelous experience.

by working with correlated people will open avenues to the future life.
by working with correlated people, it will open avenues to the future life.
working with correlated people will open avenues to the future life.

My personal point of view there is a merit in both sides.
My personal point of view is that there is a merit in both sides.

Sentence: In thiss esay I will explore the pros and cons and try to draw some conclusions.
Error: thiss Suggestion: thing
Error: esay Suggestion: essay

Sentence: By way of illustration, a huge range of people do not have linear future plans, so they can embody or realise theirselves by doing this.
Error: theirselves Suggestion: themselves

Sentence: If they did work abroad it migh well help to reach their goals.
Error: migh Suggestion: might

Sentence: For instance, income will be the preculsor of their early career.
Error: preculsor Suggestion: precursor

Sentence: On the other hand, it can be very distractive for their studies.
Error: distractive Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 276 350
No. of Characters: 1277 1500
No. of Different Words: 160 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.076 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.627 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.511 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 86 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 62 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.143 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.155 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.571 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.257 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.442 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.027 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5